Love Is Enough
by Wowzersduh
Summary: Things have been chaotic since the engagement and grad party. With people pulling them in every direction will Amy and Rickys love be enough to overcome disapproving parents and jealous friends. Especially when something happens that changes everything.
1. Sweet Dreams

***Disclaimer* I IN NO WAY OWN THE AWESOMNESS THAT IS RAMY NOR THE AWESOMENESS OF SECRET LIFE..ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO BRENDA HAMPTON & ABC FAMILY & CO. **

**I'm starting this story approx. 3 weeks after the grad party.*warning may incorporate spoilers***

**Chapter 1: Sweet Dreams**

_"I really should be sleeping right now,"_ said a very restless Amy.

The past few weeks since graduation have been a whirlwind to say the least. After the chaos of the graduation party things have been sketchy. Lauren has been calling round the clock since her and Madison aren't on good terms, but Amy hasn't been complaining because she needs a friend right now. Although being moved to the main "bff" role can be tiresome she found herself enjoying the attention.

She really couldn't say the same about Ricky he has been very understanding but between Lauren's pop up visits and him working and "John time" they never really have time for the just the two of them anymore.

_A little us time._ she thought as she looked up at Ricky who was sound asleep.

She couldn't help but smile as she watched him intently as she did every night from the first time she slept over. That first night in particular was one of her favorites, it was Johns birthday. One of their first nights together as a family; well besides the countless nights he slept over the summer she first had John but that night it was different. Johns 1st birthday was when she started letting herself feel for Ricky…as more than a friend.

Back then she knew he wasn't yet ready to be the man she needed him to; so she told herself she would continue to love him as the father of her son and lock away all her other emotions the best she could. Once they got there things settled they helped John open his presents and had some cake and ice cream. Ricky and Amy shared laughs as they watched John smear cake all over himself trying to reach his mouth.

"Y_ou're too cute," _Amy said to a smiling John.

Ricky had turned to look at her and she immediately said John…he's too cute she said her cheeks flushed red. He gave that little smile he always gave her liking how he always makes her nervous.

"_I know"_ he said thinking back to their band camp days.

After they got John bathed and put to bed Ricky set up his bed for Amy to sleep.

"_Are you sure you don't want the bed, I don't want to intrude?" _Amy said furrowing her eyebrow.

"_Amy I'm sure, I wouldn't want you anywhere else but my bed." _Ricky replied.

Amy gave him a surprised look and he realized that his words came out wrong.

_"Don't get excited you know what I meant"_ he said with a smile.

Amy rolled her eyes and cracked a smile telling him she knew what he meant.

During that night Amy got thirsty so she went to the kitchen to get some water. As she was going back to Ricky's room curiosity got the best of her so she went over to the couch where he was sleeping. He was sleeping so peacefully, beautiful even; she couldn't have been staring at him for more than 5 minutes when she heard a noise and hauled ass back to his bedroom before he caught her.

Thinking back at that moment she giggled to herself at how in denial she was back then. Now-a-days she could stare at him all day long and not care, my how things have changed. She snuggled up closer to him and stole a kiss, his breathing rose and he adjusted himself pulling her closer.

She smiled and closed her eyes; nights like this made her hate mornings her heart was so full of love and joy.

Glancing at her ring, _"I love you Ricky," _was the last words she said before dosing off to face another chaotic morning.

**First story this chapter is kind of short but the next will be longer promise. Review;)**


	2. Overslept

**Again I own none of the characters of Secret Life all are Brenda Hamptons & ABC Family**

**BUT Brenda feel free to use any of my ideas I won't mind;) *****may contain spoilers***** Hey guys i loved all the reviews and to thank you i edited the chapter because the italics were too much. Special thanks to duhnielle and secretlifefan13.**

**Last sentence from Chapter 1.**

_Glancing at her ring, "I love you Ricky," was the last words she said before dosing off to face another chaotic morning._

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2: Overslept<strong>

_Ring…Ring…Ring, _Amy groaned at the sound of her phone ringing.

Ricky could sleep through a tornado these days, a characteristic Amy was jealous of at this moment. The number calling was marked "_Restricted", _but she figured it was Ashley and answered anyway.

"Hello?"

"Hello…"_ *_click*

Hmmm that was weird she thought, but before she could even process the prank call she noticed the time 7:45! Eyes big she jumped out of bed so quick she practically yanked Ricky with her.

"Hey what's going on," he said sleepily;

"I overslept_," _yelled a frantic Amy as she ran to the bathroom. "I can't believe I'm going to be late to my first day of summer school."

"It's just summer school Amy its okay." Ricky said amused watching her run around like a mad woman.

"No it's not! Its bad enough I have to be there because of that stupid English teacher, but now when I walk in everyone's going to be staring at me and I hate that," Amy said ending in a pout.

"If I could go for you I would, but trust me it's going to be fine and if you need help with your homework I can help you_," _he said walking over and planting a sweet kiss on her lips.

"You're right, I'm just used to being so perfect and when I mess up I take it kind of hard ya'know." She said feeling a little self-conscious.

_"_I know but stop stressing, your imperfections are the most perfect things about you." Ricky said with a smile.

Returning the smile she went over and gave him a big hug, "I don't know what I would do without you."

_"_Hopefully we won't ever have to find out what life would be without each other_,"_ he responded before letting her go.

With that she went over and kissed John and headed to school.

On the way to school the restricted number called her 3 more times, but after he second attempt to see who it was she just gave up. She couldn't even get in the door good before drama met her.

_"_Madison_"_ she groaned.

_"_Oh hey Amy long time, no speak how are you?" She asked with a clueless grin.

_"_I know I've been meaning to call you I just got really busy over the weeks, things have been a little crazy." Amy said awkwardly, not sure if she should speak to her estranged best friend or not.

_"_Yea I kind of figured you'd take Lauren's side on things, since you and Lauren act like you're both perfect when you were the one who made the first mistake_." _Madison said smugly.

"Excuse me_,"_ Amy said fuming, "are you really going to look me in the face and call my son a mistake? How dare you equate John with your betrayal of friendship? That's low Madison even for you."

By this time Amy had raised her voice and not noticed the crowd that had gathered around, including Lauren, Ben, Adrian, and to her surprise Grace.

Madison who at this time felt bad, didn't show it and stood her ground.

_"_Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying. You made a mistake and had sex with Ricky which lead to John; an-and instead of getting punished you got rewarded by getting the most beautiful proposal ever_." _Madison spit out rolling her eyes. Why don't I get rewarded by showing Lauren how much of a douche Jesse really is and saving her from the heartache she would have later?" At the last statement she stomped her foot for emphasis.

_"_YOU KNOW WHAT MADISON THAT IS ENOUGH!" Lauren screamed. "Amy has actually been trying to get me to forgive you because we've been friends for so long but now…I can't even look at you after what you just said." Lauren said shaking her head in disgust.

Amy, almost near tears said "I don't know who's crazier you or Adrian…"

But before she could finish her statement an annoyed Ben told her to shut up. Which Adrian (who was enjoying seeing the downfall of the 3 musketeers) thanked him for it with a smile.

Okay that's enough everyone back to your respective classes before you all get kicked out; yelled one of the teachers and everyone dispersed back to their designated areas.

Although it was summer and she had summer school Amy still had to work at the nursery no matter how tired she was. Over the past few weeks between Ricky's showers 3 times a day and John and his fascination with the "waterfall" (his name for the water faucet in the bathroom) her and Ricky's water bill had sky rocketed. So a few extra hours at the nursery wouldn't hurt they needed all the money they could get although Ricky hadn't approved. He liked being "the man" of the house and would never ask her to put in on anything, so she came to the conclusion she simply wouldn't tell him.

"Mommy!" John screamed running to her arms.

"How's mama's little man," she said squeezing him tight. "Did you go to the potty John? Huh? Did you go potty for mama?"

"No!" He said giving her that charming little smirk she knew too well from Ricky.

These days John's favorite words were _no _and _mine._ Amy and Ricky have been trying to potty train John for the past two weeks and he refused as if saying who needs a potty when I got you two.

She gave up trying to call her mother for advice about it because every time the conversation would turn into, _why don't you and Ricky wait to get married it would just add stress to this potty problem you two are having, _and she was sick of it. Her and Ricky hadn't made any plans or set a date, but it wasn't her mothers' call to make or her dads. They decided long ago that they would wait until the time was right; although for Amy anytime was right, but she had a feeling Ricky was very serious about his "5 year plan."

"Hey Amy some guy came in earlier and played with John for a bit," the new girl Cassie said breaking Amy's train of thought.

"Really_," _Amy said confused and worried, "who?"

"Um, I don't know he said he was John's grandpa so I figured it was fine, John didn't seem upset with him or anything so I thought it was okay" said Cassie.

"Oh okay…yea that makes sense it was probably my dad, we haven't been over in about week so he probably stopped by because he missed him." Amy said shaking off the gut feeling that something didn't seem right.

_"_Okay, just thought I'd let you know everyone told me how anal you are about John," the chipper girl said before signing out and leaving.

Amy didn't know if the remark was meant to be an insult, but she sure took it that way. In the past she had been extremely overprotective of John even with Ricky, but she thought she had gotten better about it so to hear that struck a nerve. She couldn't even be that mad at her about it though because she was always so happy and chipper, but who wouldn't be she was 22 with no kids and the kids she took care of between her college classes she didn't have to take home. Looking down at John she couldn't even let herself feel jealous of Cassie because she had something better…him.

* * *

><p>Exhausted she pulled up at the butcher shop and parked. John was sleep in his car seat and she just needed a few minutes of peace and quiet before getting out. As she was picking John up she noticed out the corner of her eye a dark blue sedan parked across the street. Seeing that everything was just about closed she thought it was weird, she figured they saw her staring at them because they pulled off and sped away. Interesting, she thought as she closed the car door and headed in.<p>

"Hey Amy," Bunny said quietly noticing John was sleep.

"Hey Bunny how are you," she replied with a smile.

"Very good after seeing that little cutie, you guys have a good night." Bunny said leaving out.

"Hey where were you all day I missed you." Ricky said taking John from her and giving her the kiss she's been missing all day.

_"_Oh um I-I just went to my dad's for awhile because he hadn't seen John in a while so I thought I'd drop by there…then I fell asleep." She said proudly as she sounded very convincing to herself.

Knowing that she probably was leaving something out Ricky just said okay and they walked upstairs to the apartment. He knew whatever she was trying to keep from him was good natured so he didn't worry about it too much.

Amy put John down while Ricky grabbed a quick shower. "Can you grab me a towel?" Ricky yelled just as Amy was walking out to put their bed down. "Sure_,"_ she said turning around to the closet. _Who would turn down a sneak peek of Ricky_ she giggled to herself. When she walked in she knocked on the shower door to tell him she got the towel but he quickly grabbed her and pulled her in with him.

_"_Ricky!" Amy screamed shocked, "what are you doing?" She said with a smile.

He only smiled as he starting removing and throwing her wet clothes out on the floor.

_"_What… if …John… wakes up…"she said through deep breaths.

"You worry too much you know that;" he said smiling between kisses and simultaneously throwing her last article of clothing to the floor.

"Well how about you take my mind off it and calm me down," she said in her best seductive voice.

Deepening the kiss he picked her up and they enwrapped themselves in each other's bodies not wanting to let go. Releasing all the stress and drama of their day they didn't even break away long enough to get a good breath of air. "I love you Amy_," _Ricky said between strokes. "I love you too Ricky," Amy managed to get out between breathes. She closed her eyes and kissed him behind his ear, she never thought making love would be this enchanting. By now they knew everything about each other's body, all their likes and dislikes and Amy knew the feeling of his love very well. At that thought Amy opened her eyes big, something didnt feel right...well it felt great; but this feeling felt too great…greater than usual. She hadn't felt this feeling in a long time, not since... maybe 2 ½ years ago.

Mouth wide in shock all she could spit out was...

STOP!

**_Okay that's chapter 2 and my idea of a cliff hanger lol, the next chapter is going to be even better, alot of mystery and what's with the mystery calls? Guess you'll have to review to see =)_**


	3. Somebody's Watching Me

**All awesome characters belong to Brenda Hampton I own nothing! And the plot is all a figment of my imagination no way connected to the show. *may contain spoilers***

**Thank you all so much for the reviews I really appreciate your kind and helpful words. Special thanks to SecretlifeFan13 & Duhhnielle I edited the last chapter I was trying something new and it was a fail lol it's much easier to read… now on with the show!**

**Chapter 3: Somebody's Watching Me**

"Oh my God." Amy yelped as she hopped down grabbing the towel and exiting the shower leaving a confused Ricky.

"What, what did I do?" he said running after Amy trying to keep his voice as low as possible.

Amy gasped as she made her way to the couch, "what did you, more like what you didn't do;" She said in disbelief.

"Okay stop being dramatic and just tell me will ya." He said with a baffled look on his face.

"Ricky we were having sex…free" she said suddenly embarrassed to say the word condom.

"Okay and it was great" he responded with a halfway chuckle not seeing the problem.

"Ricky" she said with all seriousness wiping the smirk right off his face. "This isn't a joke it-it's dangerous!"

Ricky got a little offended at the "dangerous" part. "What do you mean dangerous, I got tested a long time ago and I don't have sex with anyone but you." he quipped not noticing his statement had a hint of annoyance in it.

Amy realizing her bad choice of word quickly elaborated, "Not that kind of dangerous, dangerous as in I could get pregnant and I do not want to be a teenage mother again."

"Oh that won't happen. You would have felt something and I always pull out before anyways" he said quickly regretting what he just let slip out.

"What do you mean _always,"_ she said with fear in her eyes.

"It's just a figure of speech Amy." He said not making eye contact with her. He knew she wouldn't believe him but it was worth a try.

"Don't lie to me Ricky" she said holding back angry tears "how many times has it happened;" she asked. She couldn't believe she hadn't noticed the difference before, but how could she sex was not her forte.

"I don't know Amy," he said hating how she could always catch his lie. "It happens so fast sometimes, I just can't control myself with you." he answered with pleading eyes.

"Sometimes I'll have it on for a while and I'll just take it off, but I really didn't think it was such a big deal I swear. In that moment when we're so caught up in each other I just want to I have to feel every inch of you. You just do somethin' to me Amy Juergens you always have." He said feeling a little embarrassed and mostly ashamed.

Amy just looked at him stunned she couldn't believe what he just told her. Part of her felt a little flattered but the other part of her was pissed. He knows they're in no condition for a new addition, but that didn't stop him from being careless. They had an agreement he would use a condom and she would be on the pill; at least until they were married and a little older. She upheld her end…for the most part and here he was confessing that he cheated.

"Cheater." She said to a surprised Ricky.

"What?" he said confused.

"You cheated, reneged, cut corners! We had a deal and you broke it so now…you have to be punished." She said sternly

"Punished? You have to be kidding me and don't talk to me like you're my mother; you're not my mother." He retaliated getting annoyed.

"You're right Ricky I'm not your mother! I'm _John's_ mother and that's the only person I want to be a mother to right now. So I'm sorry no more sex."

She knew he would go ballistic but she wanted to teach him a lesson. What he did was wrong so she figured she'd give him a little tough love. Also she was afraid he was trying to get her pregnant again on purpose; and she was terrified to have sex with him now.

"You can't do that Amy that isn't fair its-it's CRAZY even." Ricky said almost losing his cool. He couldn't believe the words that were coming out her mouth.

Amy stood up from the couch and stood right next to Ricky. She was so close to him that he could feel the warmth of her breath; which was getting him excited all over again. She leaned into his ear and whispered "_watch me."_

He stood there with his mouth open in disbelief with sheer terror in his eyes. He knew when Amy had her mind made up it was no changing it.

"I told you I could be crazy" she said throwing him the towel. "Here I thought you might be getting cold standing there…in your umm pajamas." She said smugly before giving him a wink and going to let the bed out.

Ricky's face flushed red. He was angry he went to John's room and got his boxers. When he came back Amy was already sleep so he climbed in beside her. Even though he was mad he still pulled her near him he liked the way she felt next to him. It was almost as if she protected him from the nightmares that would creep up on him every now and then. Amy, also upset and pretending to be asleep (as she did every time they got in an argument) snuggled up next to him out of habit. Ricky usually fidgeted in his sleep but she didn't mind, she actually thought it was cute.

* * *

><p>The next morning when Ricky woke up Amy and John were already gone. He slept in today because he didn't have to go downstairs till noon.<p>

"10:00 on the dot" he said as he rolled out of bed still tired from the night before.

He was still pissed because Amy was being childish, but he had to put part of the blame on himself too it was kind of his fault. He grabbed his phone off the counter and dialed Amy's number. It went straight to voicemail.

"_She can't really still be mad at me can she?" _he thought as he ended the call.

He went and hopped in the shower and figured he would try to work things out with Amy later when she got home. As he was putting up the sofa bed he glanced out the window and seen a dark blue truck parked outside. He hadn't noticed it before so he didn't know how long it had been out there, but something about it just didn't feel right. Especially since this wasn't the first time he seen it there, he always tried to catch who owned it just out of curiosity. It started to become like a little game with himself and the mystery car.

"Who parks in a butcher shops' alley?" he said to himself trying to figure out if the person was still in the car or not.

Closing the curtains he shrugged his shoulders and started cleaning up the mess Amy left this morning . She must have been trying to find her English book because John's things and hers were scattered everywhere. Ricky took a deep breath to calm his anxiety he did not like mess and clutter it made him feel uneasy.

Just then his phone started ringing.

"Restricted again" he said hitting ignore. Somebody had been playing on his phone the past few weeks and he was getting really annoyed.

* * *

><p>The next few days went by pretty fast, Amy wasn't really mad about the condom thing anymore but they still hadn't been having sex. Not so much because of her "punishment," but they've both been so busy lately. With Amy at summer school and working; and him registering for college, going to orientation, and working they hadn't seen much of each other. When they did get any free time they slept it away or played with John. Ricky couldn't really remember the last real conversation they had besides yesterday when he found out about her extra shifts at the nursery (which caused another disagreement). Amy ended up winning the argument one, because she called him sexist and two, because he really can't say no to her.<p>

Amy had almost been late agathe 2nd time this week looking for her English Lit book. She figured English Lit didn't like her as much as she didn't like it. She dropped John off at her dad's house so he could spend some time with him. He had been sneaking into the nursery almost every day the last week and a half to see John so she thought she would surprise him. She hadn't said anything about his little visits to John because she felt that was his and John's secret. She pulled into the school parking lot and checked her phone.

"Three missed calls" she said closing her phone.

She had gotten in touch with Ashley the other day so she knew for sure someone had been playing on her phone. She was headed to the door of the school when a gust of wind out of nowhere blew her homework out of her hand. When she finally caught it on the ground she looked up and noticed a blue sedan passing by like it was coming out of the school parking lot. A cold chill went down her spine as it was the same one she had been seeing the past week frequently.

"_I'm just being paranoid"_ she thought walking into the school.

"Hey Amy I see you took my advice and got up a little earlier to get to school on time." Ms. O'Malley said smiling walking past Amy.

Amy gave her a mocking smile back before calling onto her.

"Ms. O'Malley wait can I ask you a question." She said rushing to her side.

"Sure Amy what's up?"

"Did you see who was in that blue sedan that pulled away 5 minutes ago?" Amy said curiously.

"No I'm sorry I was in a faculty meeting earlier so I'm basically just getting her myself." She answered.

"Okay thanks anyway." Amy said sounding defeated.

"Are you okay Amy is something going on with you and Ricky?" Katelyn said looking concerned

"Oh no…no me and Ricky are great" Amy said with an immediate smile flashing her ring.

"Okay" she said with a sense of relief. "Go on to class I'll see you later." She said walking away.

* * *

><p>Amy stopped by the apartment to get her phone charger to charge her battery at work since her phone was dead. She walked into the butcher shop and seen Bunny they exchanged smiles and she headed upstairs. Amy figured Ricky must be upstairs on break because he wasn't working.<p>

"Ricky" she said taking her key out the door.

"Ricky you here?" Amy yelled.

_I guess he went to pick up something to eat_ she thought as she took her charger out of the wall.

She wanted to tell Ricky that John was at her parents and they were having dinner over there with her dad and Nora, so to come there when he got off. Of course when she went to dial his number her phone shut off signifying it was dead. She quickly wrote him a note and stuck it on the fridge before leaving for work.

* * *

><p>Ricky went over to his college on his break to finish up the paperwork for his scholarship and the rest of his financial aid. It was taking a little longer than he planned because of the line so he called to check in with Bunny.<p>

"Hey Bunny it's taking a little longer than I thought I think I'm just going to leave and hope they can fit me in next week." He said hurriedly.

"No Ricky school comes first consider yourself off. We're fine Ben is here and Louis you stay." She said sweetly.

Ricky smiled sometimes it felt like he had 3 mothers. He still didn't understand how he was so lucky to have so many people around him who he loved and have their love in return.

"Okay Bunny thanks so much." He said gratefully.

"Don't worry about it kid. Oh and Amy came by right after you left looking for you" She said before hanging up.

He hung up with Bunny and dialed Amy's number.

"Straight to voicemail," he sighed. He hated how she always forgot to charge her phone at night.

* * *

><p>Amy was so relieved to feel the cool air hit her face as she walked out the nursery. She stayed a little longer than she planned but she didn't mind, time was money. She opened the gate and started walking to her.<p>

Ricky pulled up at the Juergens' house and noticed Anne's car there.

"Oh great a full house" he said sarcastically. He was starting to wonder if this was a family dinner or another marriage intervention for him and Amy.

"Amy" he whispered shaking his head, then glancing around for her car; only to be disappointed.

"_She should be off by now"_ he thought getting worried. He tried her phone again.

Amy was reaching in her purse for her car key when her phone started vibrating.

"Hey babe I miss you" she said with a little smile.

"Where are you I'm at your dads house and you're not here, and I miss you too." He quickly added on.

"I know I ran a little behind at the nursery but I'm on my way now, I'm a little tired though I really want to go home." She whined.

"Oh no you're not leaving me with BOTH your parents, I think you set me up beautiful." He said with a smile.

"Me...No," Amy said innocently. "I love you."

"I love you too Amy." Ricky said laughing he could picture her face right now.

"Okay well I'll see you at home." Amy said quickly before hanging up the phone. He and John could eat with their parents, but she was going home because she was tired.

As she unlocked her car door she heard a noise and looked quickly behind her. She didn't see anyone but that noise was enough to make her move a little faster. Just as she opened her car door she heard someone call her name.

"Well if it isn't little miss Amy." The familiar voice said.

Amy turned quickly her face white as if she'd just seen a ghost. The person was walking closer and closer to her with what looked to be a knife in their right hand.

"Bet you never planned on seeing me again." The voice teased.

Amy was speechless. She was frozen in place scared that this would be her last moment of life and she hadn't even got to say I love you to John.

"Please don't hurt me" she managed to choke out.

"Oh not so big and bad anymore huh." The person said laughing.

"Please Karlee I'm sorry about you're…" before Amy could finish she felt a sharp pain in the left side of her head and she quickly feel to the ground. Before completely losing consciousness Amy saw the blue truck she'd been seeing the past couple weeks, along with another blue sedan.

**Okay this one was a little longer than the previous one's the story is starting to hit "the rising action" zone lol review and tell me what you think;)**


	4. Shock Value

***All characters belong to Brenda Hampton and Co. I just came up with a good plot***

**Thanks for all the great reviews its really encouraging and check out my other story "**_**Feel"**_** I want that one to be grungier and different so I might move it to the M rating page if it gets to graphic so look for it there if you can't find it.**

**Chapter 4: Shock Value**

"Ooooh" Amy groaned reaching her hand to her head weakly.

She opened her eyes slowly, they were so heavy and the room was spinning. "_Where am I"_ she thought looking around the small room. The floor was cold and she realized quickly that she wasn't in an apartment or house seeing that there were no windows only a single light bulb on the ceiling that flickered on and off.

"Ricky" she said as her voice cracked remembering that she was supposed to meet him at her parents.

She tried to move her legs to get up, but she couldn't move. Tears start rolling down her cheek she kept thinking of why she couldn't move and noticed an injection wound on her wrist. She'd been drugged.

* * *

><p>"I can't believe she tricked me." Ricky said chuckling and walking into the Juergens' house.<p>

He was shocked to see Ashley there with her friend Toby. This is probably why they wanted them to come over so bad.

"Where's Amy?" Anne said noticing she wasn't behind Ricky.

"She said she had stayed late at the nursery and she just wanted to go home" he said.

Noticing the disappointed look on Ashley's face he quickly added "I'm sure if she knew you were back Ash she would have came running, she's really missed you." he said with a smile.

Although him and Ashley weren't as close as they were before he knew that she felt like the black sheep of the family, and felt kind of bad for her.

"Yeah that's reassuring" she said rolling her eyes. "Oh well on with the festivities" she said giving an annoyed smile.

"I'm going to talk to that girl when I see her was supposed to be family bonding time" George said.

"I heard you finally got engaged congratulations hope you enjoyed your freedom." Ashley said giving Ricky a fake smile.

"I'll still have my freedom whenever we decide to get married, we're basically married now." Ricky said defensively.

"Yea" Ashley said patting Ricky on the back, "Keep telling yourself that."

Ricky walked to the table and sat down annoyed. He smiled looking at Robie and John in their high chairs having a conversation in their own way. When everything seemed wrong he could always count on John to give him a reason to smile.

At that thought it made him remember a conversation he had with Amy a while back when she was down. It was when he wanted to take John to his place for his first night there, but when he got there John was already asleep. Amy looked so exhausted and he didn't want to wake John so he told her he'd watch John while she slept in his room. She told him to wake her if he woke up and he nodded but he had no intentions to wake her she needed the rest. Instead when John woke up he rocked him back to sleep and went and peeked at Amy. She looked so beautiful and peaceful he couldn't help but smile, he went over and pushed her bang out of her face and went back to her room with John. That night his feelings got the best of him he had wanted to kiss her, but he thought better of it he had the whole summer to make a move.

He looked around the kitchen and relished in all that has come since then. Being there made him miss Amy more.

"Can you guys excuse I'm going to give Amy a call." He said removing himself from the table her phone kept ringing and ringing. _Maybe she's still driving_ he thought and sat back at the table and finished dinner.

* * *

><p>After dozing back off from the drugs Amy had woke up in a sweat. She didn't know if the coldest was from the floor or her sweat, but she noticed the cut on her head was no longer bleeding someone had bandaged it up.<p>

"_I can't believe Karlee would go to such a crazy extent over something that she caused herself"_ Amy thought.

"All this because Ricky doesn't want her she's certainly beat Adrian on my crazy list" she whispered to herself. Just then she thought she heard footsteps.

"Help!" she screamed.

"Can anyone hear me? Please!" she pleaded hoping someone would come to her rescue or pass by what she now realized was a storage unit.

"Arrgh" she heard someone groan from behind her.

She froze afraid to turn around. She finally found the courage to see who else was stuck in the unit with her. She gasped.

"Karlee!" she said in shock.

Karlee opened her eyes and noticed Amy. "What happened?" she said tired and confused. "What did you do to me?" she questioned.

Amy eyes now big was speechless, she looked and saw Karlee was bound by the feet. She was now more lost than before.

"You hit me I thought you locked me in here." She said inquisitively.

"I didn't hit you I wasn't going to hurt you I just wanted to scare you." she answered.

"Then who did?" Amy asked searching for answers.

"I don't know we were talking my plan was going accordingly I had you scared shitless then all of a sudden I see this hand fly around and hit you with a rock and before I could turn around to see who did it everything went black." She said trying to figure things out herself.

"So who ever hit me probably hit you too..." Amy started but a voice interrupted her sending a chill down her spine.

The man walked closer to them, "Nice to see my company awake" the cynical voice said laughing.

Amy closed her eyes and felt the tears flow out everything was beginning to make sense.

* * *

><p>Ricky parked his car and noticed Amy's SUV wasn't there. He hurried upstairs to the apartment to get his charger so he could call her he was beginning to get worried. His phone had died a little before he left George's he decided to let John stay over there to play with Robie he wanted them to be closer. As soon as his phone came on it began ringing it was Margaret.<p>

"Hey mom is everything okay you never call me this late." He said knowing that he was about to get bad news.

"Son, I really hate I have to tell you this but I was trying to get in touch with you and Amy all afternoon." She said very fast.

"What is it? Is dad okay?" his voice cracking with concern.

"Yes Shakur is fine, but Ricky Ruben called today…he said Bob was released 3 weeks ago." She said cautiously.

"Ricky…Ricky" Margaret said concerned.

Ricky was frozen with the phone to his ear. He heard Margaret calling his name but he couldn't speak. He felt the fire of tears welling up in his eyes. He hated how one name could shake him to the core, how it could make him that scared little boy again. He took his phone and slung it at the wall shattering it. He took the table and flipped it over kicking the chairs. He couldn't help it he had lost control rage consumed him. His face was flushed red and he was throwing everything in sight and screaming. He was thankful John and Amy weren't there to see him like this. They got a glance with the Karlee thing but he vowed to never get that out of control again. At the thought of her name he got an awful thought and fell to his knees.

Bob was out and Amy was gone…

**So there's a twist sorry this one was a tad short ran out of ideas but I wanted too give you guys a chapter hope you like review with your thoughts/ideas;)**


	5. Lost and Found

***Secret Life and its characters belong to Brenda Hampton and the epicness that is RAMY this is just a figment of my fan girl imagination. Again thanks for the reviews***

**Chapter 5: Lost and Found**

Bob dragged Amy to an isolated part of the storage unit where he had set up a divider. Amy still weak from the drugs he gave her earlier couldn't fight him off like she wanted so she relented and let him take her to the room yet again. He would take her in the room everyday and she would cry and scream at him. Karlee would still be in the main part of the unit and would hear Amy's heart wrenching screams and cry for her. Whenever she would return to the part where she was she would see the tear stains and dried up mascara on Amy's cheeks. She also saw she had bruises on her wrists and a red mark on her face. Karlee didn't dare ask Amy what happened in there part of her didn't think Amy wanted to talk about it the other part didn't want to know.

"We aren't getting any food today" Amy said blankly, shaking Karlee out of her thoughts.

Just then Bob came out of the little make shift room angrily. He stopped right where they were sitting and spat at them, grinned then walked out slamming the door.

"He's disgusting "Karlee said wiping her arm against her shirt.

Three weeks had gone by and Amy was trying to stay hopeful that someone would find her and Karlee and save them from Bob's terror, but she was slowly losing hope. She didn't know how long she could continue to act strong. Every day he was breaking her down more and more being in that little room was killing her and she was hungry. She told herself she would starve before giving Bob what he wanted and that was exactly what she was doing starving. She kind of felt bad that Karlee wouldn't eat because of her but at the same time she didn't care it was her fault.

Bob had told them all about how he had been following her and Ricky waiting for the perfect time to snatch up John and he thought he had found it that night Amy was there alone. That night he had planned to take John and be out of the state by now, but since Amy broke her normal routine and dropped John off at her parents it ruined it for him. After hitting Amy with the rock he quickly pinched Karlee's corroded artery and made her pass out, but when he went to fetch John he seen he wasn't in the car so he thought fast and grabbed Amy. When he got done throwing Amy in the car he went back to get Karlee because she knew too much.

Just thinking about how if she had of taken John to the nursery that morning right now he would be gone tears started flowing down her eyes. She wiped them away quickly before anyone seen. Bob was an animal and animals smell fear, besides John was safe and she had to be strong so she can get back to him and Ricky.

"What are we going to do" a frustrated Karlee asked Amy.

"I don't know" Amy said not even looking at her.

"Look I know that I'm the reason we're even in this mess, but we're gonna have to work together to get out of it." Karlee exclaimed.

As much as Amy hated to admit it Karlee was right. Hating her wasn't doing anything but prolonging her stay it had already been 3 weeks and 4 days, and they would have a much better chance at surviving if they worked together.

"Okay let's just call a truce." Amy said giving Karlee a half smile.

Karlee returned the sentiment and they began scheming.

"Okay so we can't try the door because we know that's locked from when you tried last week." Karlee said wondering.

"There are tools in that little room back there we could get one and when he comes back hit him with it." Amy suggested.

"Problem is how are we going to get over there he shot me up with that stuff after he took you in that room" Karlee said sounding defeated.

"I'm a little weak because we haven't eaten since those sandwiches he gave us last week, but I know I can make it and by time he comes back the drugs should be wearing off of you." Amy said excitedly that they had finally had a way out.

She got up slowly and made her move towards the room. Once she got in there she tried to remember exactly where she had seem the tool box. _Under the bed s_he thought as she bent down and pulled up the blanket, nothing. She got up a little too fast and felt dizzy and fell down to the floor as she was getting up she saw a bright red box under the dresser and grabbed it. _Bingo_ she said as she rummaged through the box and grabbed the hammer.

She peeked out before running back to her and Karlee's pallet.

"Now what? "Amy said hiding the hammer under the thin blanket.

"Now we wait" Karlee said dozing off involuntarily from the drugs.

"We wait" Amy repeated. "Mamas coming John I love you" she said staring off into the empty room.

* * *

><p>Ricky was going crazy he had been trying to find Amy for the past few weeks, but had no luck. He even went to his old neighborhood to see if he could find Bob there but he was too smart for that. Ricky was a wreck it had gotten to the point where he wouldn't even leave the apartment. Thankfully Bunny had understood because he hadn't gone into work since Amy had been missing. He tried to take care of John, but every time he thought he had it together his emotions would get the best of him every time John would cry for Amy so he decided it would be best for him to stay with George for a while. He didn't want John to see him like that. The only time he would leave was at 8:00 every night to the nursery and wait till everyone left and hope to see Amy.<p>

"Ricky open up" a voice screamed while banging on the door.

"I know you don't want to talk, but I think I got a new lead." Ruben said pleading for him to open up. No one could seem to get Ricky to snap out of his depression he thought good news might cheer him up.

Ricky jumped up from the couch and raced to the door.

"A new lead?" he said while opening the door.

"Yeah –"Ruben said and stopped noticing how the usually up kept apartment was trashed.

Ricky noticed what he was looking at and spoke "they say how clean a room is a reflection of your life…without Amy mine is a mess." He said sitting on the couch.

Ruben gave him a sympathetic look and decided to sit down.

"An anonymous call came in earlier saying they seen a strange man rent out a storage unit over in the next town and he had two women with him that appeared to be sleeping in the car one older another younger he assumed they were his wife and kid, but when the employee asked about them the man got antsy and snapped at him. He told him to mind his business." Ruben said watching Ricky's facial expression.

"Okay, but my fa- Bob doesn't have a wife and you guys aren't looking for 2 women you're looking for Amy" Ricky said confused and slightly annoyed.

"The man the caller described fits Bob's description and we got another missing persons report the day after we got Amy's and we didn't think they were connected till now." Ruben said anxiously.

'Why now?" Ricky asked still not getting where the story was heading.

"Do you know a Karlee Carmichael?" Ruben asked raising an eyebrow.

Ricky fell silent in disbelief.

"Yea" he said flatly tired that she once again was causing trouble in his life.

"Well we found out that the Blue Sedan that was parked next to Amy's car belonged to her." Ruben stated.

"So she was working with Bob to hurt me?" Ricky said furiously.

"That or she was in the wrong place at the wrong time" Ruben said shrugging.

"So what now, are they going to the storage place?" Ricky asked.

"As soon as we get the search warrant cleared" Ruben said noticing the shift in Ricky's eyes.

"How long?" Ricky said curiously knowing bad news was coming.

"A few days" Ruben said looking down.

"A few days are too long who knows what all he's done to her or they've done to her give me the address I'll go myself." Ricky said frantically. "She needs help now!"

"Ricky I'm sorry we're moving as fast as we can, but I can't give you the address it's against the law." Ruben said sympathetically.

Ricky was about to blow a casket but he had a better idea.

"I'm sorry about the outburst Ruben I know you guys are doing all you can and I really appreciate it." He said stretching out his arms for a hug.

Ruben got up and returned the favor.

"I know this is hard but Amy is strong and she will get through this trust me." He said walking to the door.

"I already talked to the Juergens' and they are excited about the new developments hope to see you soon." Ruben said giving Ricky a smile.

"Thanks again" Ricky said flashing a fake smile and closing the door.

He went over to the table sitting down, and opened the piece of paper he lifted out of Rubens pocket during their hug. He hated reverting back to his pick pocketing days but he wasn't gonna let Amy suffer another day in that place if he could get to her.

"I'm coming Amy" he said getting his car keys and heading out the door.

* * *

><p>Karlee and Amy took their places on opposite sides of the door. The plan was he would open the door see Karlee and Amy would pound his head in with the hammer and they would make a run for it. In opposite directions of course so he couldn't catch them both.<p>

"I hear him coming" Karlee said giving Amy a look.

Amy nodded signaling she was ready and raised the hammer over her head. Bob unlocked the door and opened it and from there everything went in slow motion. Something was wrong.

As soon as Amy went to lower the hammer the room went blurry and she felt herself falling to ground to Karlee's screams.

Bob laughed at their failed escape attempt and grabbed Karlee by her hair stepping over Amy dragging her. Karlee tried fighting back but stopped when she seen Bob pull out his gun. He bound her hands and feet with tape and went to gather Amy.

"You've been a bad girl Amy" he said snickering looking down at her unconscious.

"Why must you be so much like that bitch Nora" he spat like her name was disgusting.

"Now I have to teach you a lesson." He said smirking.

He put the gun in his pocket and threw Amy over his shoulder carrying her into the little room. He threw her down on the bed giving a devilish grin.

* * *

><p>Ricky pulled up to the storage place and ran into the office.<p>

"Can I get some help in here" he screamed looking around for anybody who worked there.

"Quiet down I'm coming" an old man said reaching the counter. "What do you need?"

"Do you know where this unit is located it's an emergency" Ricky spilled out of breath.

"Yes it's on the left side near the rear it's a double one" The old man said opening the gate looking concerned.

"Thank you" he said before rushing out to catch the gate before it closed.

The man called the police as soon as Ricky was out of sight figuring he was some crazy kid looking for trouble.

Ricky ran through the lot like a mad man when he came upon the unit number he was looking for. It was locked.

"Damn it" he said running his fingers through his hair. Then a light bulb went off and he reached in his pocket grabbing a paper clip.

He quickly tried picking the lock. He fumbled at first, a little rusty because he hadn't picked a lock in almost 3 years…since band camp. With that thought he got refocused on the lock and it popped open.

"Yes" he said racing in.

"Am-"he started to yell before he seen Karlee taped up in the corner. He ran to her and untapped her mouth.

"Where's Amy?" he said his eyes were dark and menacing.

"He took her to the back after she passed out" she started before Ricky ran to the back of the storage unit.

"Amy…Amy!" he said frantically before getting to the little room seeing his father on top of her unbuckling his belt. He saw red.

"Get the fuck off of her" he screamed lounging at Bob and throwing him to the floor and punching him in the mouth.

"Nice of you to join the party son" he said laughing spitting out blood.

He chopped Ricky in his throat he winced in pain and rolled off trying to catch his breath. Bob got up and yanked Amy off the bed and pulled out his gun.

"Leave her alone you don't want her you want me." Ricky choked out hate in his eyes.

"Actually I want John you're a little out of my age limit" he said trying to get a rise out of Ricky.

At that Ricky lounged at him again but Bob moved dragging Amy with him who now was starting to gain consciousness.

"Uh un son" he said waving his gun.

"Ricky?" she said deliriously.

Ricky saw the red mark on her face and felt his body fuming.

"You bastard!" Ricky yelled as a tear rolled down his cheek.

Bob just continued to laugh.

"Richard you should know by now that I always have control." He chastised.

Just then police barged in and Ricky went to grab the gun. Amy stumbled against the wall while Ricky and Bob struggled for control of the 9 millimeter pistol. Ricky almost had it when Amy ran over trying to help.

_POW!_

Amy screamed as she heard the gun shot and everything went still. All three of them lay huddled in a ball afraid to move.

The police ran towards the back of the unit after they heard the gun go off and screaming.

"Don't move" Ruben said as the rest of the officers came tearing into the make shift room.

Ricky looked down and saw blood oozing onto the floor. It was some on his shirt and he thought he was shot until he didn't feel a wound. Relieved he pulled Amy closer unto his lap and kissed her forehead.

"Everything's okay now." He whispered in her ear rocking her.

The police grabbed Bob who also had blood on him and he was still laughing like a maniac as they drug him off in hand cuffs. He kept telling Ricky he wasn't through yet.

Amy had her eyes closed and she was trying to say something, but fell back unconscious.

Ricky re-adjusted himself as Amy's head laid on his shoulders; wrapping his arm around her waist he felt something wet on his finger tips. He looked at his hand then down to Amy's side and saw her white shirt covered in blood. He started freaking seeing it come out so profusely and jumped up.

"We need a paramedic back here" he screamed lifting Amy up "she's been shot!" he cried.

The paramedic came back with the gurney and Ricky stayed by her side holding her hand telling her to hold on as she drifted back in forth to sleep. She tried to hold onto his hand but hers went limp and she closed her eyes. They lifted her into the ambulance and closed the doors.

Anne rushed over and got in with Amy and they pulled off. He turned and saw George and Nora behind him with tears in their eyes.

Ricky was frozen he just stood there watching as the ambulance pulled away. He looked down at the diamond ring that slid off of Amy's thin finger into his and whispered.

I love you.

**Okay that's chapter 5 what happens now? I don't know review and see;)**


	6. Tracks Of My Tears

***Brenda Hampton owns Secret Life and its characters I'm just a fan with a dream lol. I'm like the ultimate JaSam shipper(General Hospital) and I decided to intertwine one of my favorite scenes of them in this story so I don't own the idea, but I did make it my own and put a twist on it.***

**Chapter 6: Tracks of My Tears**

**Ricky POV**

I stood outside of Amy's hospital room peering inside the little window. Anne was in there with her so she wasn't alone that was good. It's been two days since we found her she'd been in out of consciousness since she was brought in, mostly because the doctors kept her heavily doped up on pain pills. I looked as her eyes flickered open for a bit then closed soon after. Anne hung her head and kissed her hand before leaving the room.

"Ricky you and John should go home and get some rest she'll be fine." George said walking up to me patting my back.

"If anything changes we'll call you." Anne added in sympathetically.

I stood there emotionless for a second still peering at my fiancée who was halfway dead because of me and shook away a tear. I made up my mind that this would be the last time Amy felt pain because of me.

"I just want to let her know I'm leaving" I said heading inside her room.

"How do you think he's holding up?" Anne asked.

George stood watching Ricky inside the room "I don't know, Anne I just don't know."

I sat down next to Amy's bed and pushed her hair out of her face. She looked so peaceful a tear rolled down my cheek as I seen the bruise that still called her cheek home. It was slowly fading away, but not as fast as I wanted it to. My eyes then roamed to the feeding tube they hooked up to her because that bastard wouldn't feed her. I looked at her boney fingers in mine and kissed them.

"I'm sorry gorgeous" I managed to choke out through tears. As I looked toward her lower abdomen that still held the bullet that was meant for me there.

The doctors were waiting till Amy was completely stable before doing the surgery. Which as fate has it was happening later on today. I forced myself to get up and I kissed Amy on the forehead before whispering I love you and leaving the room.

When I got out the door I heard the police and doctors talking to Mr. and Mrs. Juergens.

"We wanted to do a rape test when she was brought in, but the extensive lashes between her legs caught our immediate attention so we decided to stitch up the lacerations first " one of Amy's doctors said.

"So is it too late to perform the test?" an officer and Mrs. Juergens asked simultaneously.

"Well we usually try to do those types of tests as soon as possible for accuracy" The doctor began before I lashed out at him.

"He didn't touch her" I yelled as tears fell from my eyes. "I caught the son of a bitch before he had a chance." I spit out disgusted.

"Ricky" Anne gasped shocked at my outburst. George just stared at me equally surprised.

I immediately felt embarrassed especially since John was right there witnessing me lose control.

"I'm sorry" I mumbled grabbing John. "I just want her to be okay" I said as my voice cracked.

I walked out the door as I heard the officer say "Ms. Carmichael said that Bob had taken Amy into that room alone several times and she would scream…"

I felt my knees buckle up under me, but I had John in my arms and I had to be strong for him. When I got to the car gripped my steering wheel until my knuckles turned white and cried silently inside for myself and most importantly for Amy. I prayed to God that Bob didn't touch her either way she'd never be the same.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy POV<strong>

_The wind blew gently as I was walking down the aisle. It was finally the day that I would be bound to the love of my life forever. The meadow was set up so beautifully with lilies and daisies everywhere, I turned to my left and right and seen our families smiling faces. Even Adrian and Ben had come and looked happy for us. I saw John standing next to his daddy fidgeting because he wanted to go play in the field and Ricky gently grabbing his hand. I promised Ricky I wouldn't cry but I couldn't help it, there he was at the end of the aisle smiling waiting to love me forever. Me little old plain Amy Juergens I smiled the closer I got to him loosening the grip on my father's arm. I know it isn't tradition but I just wanted to run to him. I couldn't control the love that was growing inside of me when I got to him I jumped in his arms and he swung me around. He was going to kiss me until everything went dark it started to rain and I heard thunder and turned to face the crowd. Out of nowhere I heard a bang and something piercing through my lower abdomen. It burned. Fire was inside of me I screamed and dropped to my knees still in Ricky's arms. I saw tears in his eyes and he kept saying sorry as my eyes were closing I looked to my left hand and seen that it was empty…_

"Ricky" my voice managed to say very raspy.

"Amy can you hear me are you okay?" I heard my mom ask.

I didn't answer and my eyes were still closed I thought I was blind for a second before I pushed my eyelids up that seemed to weigh 20 lbs.

"Mom?" I opened my eyes trying to adjust to the light.

"Oh Amy " she said excitedly grabbing me into her arms.

"Ow ow ow" I cried in pain feeling every inch of my wounds from my head to my toes.

"Oh my lanta, I'm sorry honey I got a little too excited" she chuckled.

"What's going on where's Ricky and John where am I?" I said panicking.

"He went home to get cleaned up they're coming back soon don't worry they're okay, you're the one that's hurt." My mom reassured me.

"Hurt?" I asked finally realizing that I'm in a hospital room.

"Yes can you remember anything, do you know why you're here" she asked cautiously.

Before I could answer I looked at the IV in my arm and my left hand. My eyes got huge and I felt like my airway had cut off I couldn't breathe and I felt the tears forming than gushing out my eyes.

"My ring" I choked out almost in a whisper.

"Amy calm down what is it?" my mom said getting up furrowing her eyebrows.

"MY ring!" this time I screamed hysterically.

"Where is my ring" I was screaming and crying this time and my mother watched in horror not knowing what to do.

The monitors hooked up to me started to sound off and I continued my hysterics.

**Ricky POV**

As I turned the corner to the hall Amy's room was on I heard what I thought was her screaming so I walked a little faster. Then I noticed doctors rushing in so I ran as my heartbeat louder than my footsteps.

"Where's my ring" she was crying out over and over frantically.

When I got to the door my heart dropped down to my feet. There she was wide awake, her face 3 kinds of red and tear stained crying her heart out as doctors tried to hold her down to sedate her.

She looked at me and began reaching her arms out like John did for me at times when he was scared and I ran to her.

"Ricky" she cried in my arms "they stole my ring" she choked out between sobs.

"Amy its okay I have your ring" I said trying to remain calm although seeing her like this was breaking me.

She lifted out of my arms and stared at me confused. I pulled her ring out of my pocket and showed it to her. She continued to cry I guess the confusion of what was going on was getting to her. I pulled her hand into mine and slid her ring back on.

She gave me a weak smile and I gave her one back before she laid back into the bed medicine starting to kick in.

I kissed her forehead and looked around the now quiet room at all the doctors and her parents who all looked broken and shocked.

"She was so broken" was all Anne managed to get out before turning into George crying.

George didn't say anything he just looked down at Amy.

"I've never seen anything like that in my life" one of the doctors said.

"It's time to wheel her to surgery" one of the others said.

As I was getting up so they could take Amy she grabbed my hand as hard as she could.

"Ricky" she whimpered tears cascading down her eyes.

I felt them starting to roll down my own cheeks as looked into her eyes, but didn't bother to wipe them away.

"Don't let them take my ring" she huffed barely above a whisper before succumbing to the sedative.

I bent down and kissed the last tear that ran down her cheek. I tried to whisper to her that I wouldn't but my words were stuck in my throat and all I could do was cry.

George came and basically pried me away from her as they wheeled her out of the room.

"She'll be okay son" he said as if to convince himself.

* * *

><p>It felt like we were in the waiting room for hours when my phone started to ring. It was an unknown number, but I decided to answer anyway.<p>

"Hello" I said exhausted.

"Do you accept this collect call from BOB Underwood" I almost couldn't breathe hearing that name I said yes just above a whisper.

"Good choice in accepting my call" he snarled.

"What the hell do you want" I said walking away towards the bathroom.

"It's not over Ricky not in the least this is only the beginning" he said before hanging up.

I snapped my phone shut and busted into the bathroom. I punched the first stall I seen, then the second, and a third before the numbness washed over my hand. I felt wetness hitting my face and looked up to see if the roof was leaking, but when I looked in the mirror I seen tears falling down my eyes. I was crying again.

I slammed my good hand onto the sink before turning on the cold water and letting it hit my face. _This is it _I thought looking in the mirror. I promised to protect Amy and I'll do anything for our love even if it meant walking away to secure her safety.

As I came back into the waiting room they told us surgery went well. The doctor said the bullet hit her uterus slightly and they don't know whether or not she would be able to have more kids or carry to term.

At that I dropped my head in my lap and rubbed my neck. How was I suppose to tell Amy that she may not be able to have more children. She always shrugged off the thought of more because she thought I didn't want anymore, but I knew she did. She loved John and she wanted more after we were married. I shook my head as George and Anne took turns patting my back.

"Can we see her?" Anne asked and the doctor nodded so she went on back.

"How are we supposed to tell her that?" I asked George and for the first time I seen tears in his eyes.

"I think you should tell her, she'd take it better if you tell her." he exclaimed.

I knew I would be the one who would have to deliver the news but I didn't want to. I didn't want to be the one to see the hurt on her face or the self hatred because she'd blame herself. But I knew she would want me to tell her and I couldn't be selfish. I nodded my head and leaned back closing my eyes.

"Ricky" Anne tapped my shoulder "she's asking for you and John." she let out a half smile.

I got up and took John's hand as I followed Anne and George preparing myself for a conversation I never thought I'd have to have.

"See mama" John asked searching my eyes for answers.

"Yea buddy we're going to see mama" at that I felt my lips curl into a smile I hadn't showed in almost 2 months.

"John" Amy said weakly still a little off from the meds.

"Mama!" he screamed excitedly reaching for her.

I lifted him unto the bed as I watched the two most important people in my life giggle and laugh. I wanted so badly to laugh and joke with them, but I knew soon that this atmosphere would change drastically.

"Ricky what's the matter" she asked frowning reaching out her hand for mine.

I attempted a smile and failed as I could feel the tears welling up. Mr. and Mrs. Juergens must have noticed because they took John and said they'd be back later.

"What's going on" she asked sitting up with tears brimming her own eyes.

"A-my" my voice cracked.

"What" she screeched wiping her tears away.

I panicked I didn't know what to do at that moment looking at the hurt in her eyes I wanted to go back. I wanted to go back and be a normal teenager without responsibility. I wanted to be the care-free guy that didn't give a damn whether he lived or died. I wanted to go back to have indiscriminate sex because the pain of that was less hurtful, less painful than looking into the eyes of the woman I'd die for, I cry for, and I love and tell them something this devastating. I didn't want to feel right now.

"Amy the bullet hit" _I paused why did I pause… the wetness on my cheeks is back. _I thought before I felt Amy reach up and wipe them away. I laid my head in her hands happy to feel her touch again. She caressed my face gently.

"It's okay Ricky as long as you're by my side I can handle anything" she said smiling weakly at me.

I closed my eyes which was cowardly because I didn't want to see her expression. I hate seeing her cry.

"Amy the bullet hit your uterus…and the doctors said they don't know if you can have children." I said letting go of a breath I'd been holding.

She stared at me confused for a minute then another tear fell.

"Ricky why would you lie to me about something like that" her voice cracking with hurt.

I was shocked that she would think I would do something to hurt her but I figured it was just the denial of it all.

"Amy I'd never lie about something like this, not when I know how much you want children." I said with compassion.

"You don't want kids that's why you're saying this to me" she said getting angry.

"Amy I promise I wouldn't lie to you about this" I said trying to hold her.

"No, no you're lying" she screamed fighting me as I held her tighter.

"I don't believe you" she yelled frantically tears coming from her eyes "I don't believe you!"

The monitors started going off signaling her blood pressure and heart rate had gone up.

"Amy you have to calm down" I tried to reason with her through my own tears.

"Ricky you're lying!" she cried into my shoulder still hitting me.

"Baby please don't do this" this time I was getting a little hysterical.

The doctors rushed in and shooed me out so they could calm her down. I looked into the little window I knew too well and watched as she screamed and cried as they put her to sleep. Then she slowly slid back into the bed hopefully where she could get away from the harsh reality we were living in. I prayed she'd dream up something happy or have memories of happier times. Anything to take the pain away.

I pulled myself away from the window just as the Juergens came around the corner with John.

"How'd she take it" they asked.

She hates me was all I could say as I grabbed John and headed for the door.

**Thats chapter 6 and next chapter is probably going to be just as heartbreaking but in the end it'll be all smiles so stay tuned:) I didn't proofread too good because i wanted to get the chapter up hope you enjoyed;)**


	7. Separated

***All rights are to Brenda Hampton & Co. I'm not a thief lol. But the plot is mine and Brenda you can steal if you want to lol.***

**Chapter 7: Separated **

**Ricky POV**

I took John's hand and walked towards the door with the flashing red Exit sign above it. I drowned out John telling me no and picked him up because his little feet weren't moving fast enough. I had so many thoughts running through my mind that the whole rest of the night felt like I was outside of my body. I was watching myself feed and bathe John, I was watching myself clean up around the house, and I was watching myself cry as John slept.

* * *

><p>I must have finally gone to sleep because I woke up to John's hands slapping my face.<p>

"Wake up daddy" he giggled

"Hey buddy" I smiled "you didn't have to hit me so hard" I laughed as I got up.

He ran off to play with his toys because he knew a bath was coming. As I was going after him my phone rang, _Anne_. I know I shouldn't have but I debated whether or not to answer her call or not. I already knew what this would be about but I didn't want to go to the hospital. Its not that I didn't want to see Amy I had some things to do first.

Curiosity got the best of me though "Hello" I yawned out.

"Hi, Ricky sorry to wake you"

"Oh no, you didn't wake me, I was slapped up" I smiled thinking of John's wake up call.

"Huh?"

"Nothing what's going on?" I asked tired of the small talk.

"Amy won't admit it right now, but she wants you to be here with her, I want you to be here with her." she hesitated at the last part.

"I know and I'm gonna be there I know she didn't mean all that stuff she said I'm not upset with her." I replied in all honesty.

"Okay great are you coming now?" she asked impatiently.

"I wasn't planning to, me and John have a stop to make first, is everything okay?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Yea, you know the usual Amy's crying and I need you to make her stop."

I sighed as guilt started to creep into me. Truthfully, I imagine that when I get there the tears won't stop it will probably be more from me and her. Especially after she hears what I have to say.

"I'll be there as soon as I can" I rushed out and hung up before she could respond.

I showered and dressed me and John quickly and called a number I never thought I'd be dialing again.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy POV<strong>

"Are you sure it was a good idea letting him in there?" George asked Anne as they looked in on Amy and her company through the little window.

"Well someone has to get through to her at least till Ricky gets here." Anne whispered.

"I don't think he'll be too happy to know you called him to visit her." George accused.

Anne rolled her eyes "He'll get over it, it's for the sake of Amy egos aside." she said elbowing George in the side.

I laid still in my bed facing the window in my room. It looked so beautiful outside like any other sunny day in California. It felt the same, like all the other days before all the craziness broke out. Before everything changed. I put my hand on the stitched up area of my stomach where they did my surgery and I felt a tear roll down.

"Amy are you alright" he said coming to my side and holding my hand like the countless times he's done before.

I slid my hand out of his not to be mean or rude, but because I didn't want to be consoled I wanted what Ricky said to not be true. I wanted to go back to the sunny days that didn't hold pain. It was beautiful outside, but inside my mind it was ugly and raining.

"What are you doing here Ben?" I asked still looking out the window. "Are you here to bask in my pain?" I said as another tear slipped out.

"Of course not" hurt was written on his face. "I know over this last year we haven't been on great terms but we still have a lot of history, and although we're in love with other people I still care about you." he said grabbing my hand again.

"I don't want you to care" I whimpered out "your caring isn't going to fix me." I said coldly yanking my hand away.

"Amy look at me" he said calmly.

I shook my head and tightened my lips.

"Now!" he said sternly.

I forced my eyes to make contact with his "what!"

"You will get through this." he said attempting to get my mind right.

I rolled my eyes at him and gave him a sarcastic laugh.

"And how can you be so sure?" I asked him rhetorically, but he answered anyway.

"Because Amy you are strong and ambitious. You never give up or back down from a fight and so what the doctors said there's a chance you may not have children." He lectured. "There's an even greater chance you will only time will tell! So get it together and stop feeling sorry for yourself woman" he chuckled after the last part and I did too unwillingly.

"John needs you and if you're here feeling sorry for yourself who's gonna keep Ricky in line" he laughed.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed his hand. "Thanks Ben."

"I owed you" he said kissing my hand. "You were there for me so lets just call it even."

"Okay" I whispered.

"Adrian wanted to come but she couldn't get out of summer school" he said walking towards the door.

"Tell her I said hey" I gave a half smile.

"Take care of yourself Amy, be strong" he said giving me a wink and leaving.

I laughed and laid back in my bed. He was right there were procedures I could do if it came down to it, no use in thinking the worse I said as I drifted off to sleep.

**Ricky POV**

I watched John play on the jungle gym while I sat on the park bench consumed with my thoughts. I didn't want to do this but it was the only way I could think of to keep Amy and John safe.

"Hey Ricky" a voice said from behind me.

I gave a little smile and motioned them to sit down.

"So what did you want to meet about?" Karlee asked curiously.

"I just need to know if" I hesitated "If my fa- Bob touched Amy." I groaned feeling myself getting angry.

She looked at me for a minute before answering. "I honestly don't know" she gave me a sympathetic look.

"There were times where he would take her to that little room and it would be quiet for a minute, then there would be a bang or some other loud noise." She looked up at me to see my expression.

"Amy would scream then there would be more noises" she looked over at John who was now on the seesaw.

"He wanted sex. Not just any sex, he wanted sex from Amy. If she didn't do what he said then we didn't get any food" she said after a moment of uncomfortable silence.

"We got food one time." she said staring at me.

My hands balled into fists and I could feel my jaw clench.

"Ricky I'm not saying he raped her" she said trying to calm me down "I'm just saying he fed us one time. I don't think he wanted us to die, he just wanted us to torture us for ruining his plans."

"His plans?" I asked confused.

"He really wanted John, he thought he would be with Amy that night but he wasn't. You know he was going to the nursery while you guys were away and visiting John. The guy's sadistic but I know you know that." she said looking down.

"Yea I know" I replied softening my voice. "After today Amy and John will no longer suffer on my account." I said looking at John.

"What are you gonna do?" Karlee questioned.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy<strong>

I yawned and stretched the best I could not wanting to feel the pain. It was getting close to 5 and Ricky still wasn't here.

"Mom" I yelled as loud as I could. No answer.

I laid back and looked at the ceiling. I wanted to see John and I know Ricky is mad about what I said yesterday but I didn't mean it. I didn't mean what I said, I don't even know why I said it. I know he'd never lie to me, I guess it was the shock and pain talking.

What I really regret is hitting him I was really hitting him. Those weren't love taps or cute pats I was beating him as hard as I could. Thinking about it made my eyes water because I know he must have thought back to his childhood. Here it was another person who loved him hitting him. The tear fell down.

"How could I be so stupid" I thought out loud.

"You're not stupid" a voice said from the door.

I looked up and smiled. He smirked.

"Hi Amy"

"Hi Ricky" I said not able to hold my grin. I missed him.

"I'm sorry" we both said in unison then diverted our eyes elsewhere in shame.

He came over and sat by my bed and I seen John walking over as well.

"John" I exclaimed happily "How's mamas little man" he giggled.

I laughed then looked at Ricky he was smiling but his eyes were sad.

"Ricky I'm sorry for yesterday" I spilled out.

"Its okay Amy I know you didn't mean it" he said holding my hand that wasn't around John.

"No its not I had no right to hit you like that especially when.." I sniffled and looked down not able to finish my sentence.

He lifted my chin and met my eyes. "Amy nothing you could ever do would make me think of my past. I know you love me and I know your heart at that moment you were consumed with pain and I don't hold it against you so you don't hold it against yourself" I nodded and he wiped away a tear as he sealed his statement with a kiss.

"I missed you so much Ricky" I sighed.

He shifted uneasy like something was weighing on his mind.

"Is everything okay?" I asked taking his hand.

He looked down at the floor than back at me.

**Ricky POV**

I got off Amy's bed and stared out the window. I was dreading the words that were about to come out my mouth. _You promised to protect her_ I thought giving myself a pep talk.

"Amy I can't do this anymore" I said quickly avoiding eye contact.

"What" she gasped lips trembling.

"I can't keep putting you and John in danger because of me. Because of my past you deserve better." I said hearing my voice crack.

Her face was getting flushed and she was staring at me.

"You're leaving me?" she muttered tearfully.

"I think when you get discharged you and John should stay at your parents house" I said numbly staring at random things in the room.

"No, Ricky I want to be with you." she whimpered.

By now John sensed what was going on he started to get fussy in Amy's arms.

"Ricky please" she started but I was backing away to the door.

"Ricky" she cried. As I turned around just in time because I could no longer hold my tears back.

"Ricky comeback please" I heard her pleading as I walked down the hall.

Mr. and Mrs. Juergens were just getting back as I got to the lobby. I called them before I got here and told them that Amy would need them tonight.

**Amy **

I held onto to John for dear life and we were both crying into each other's shoulder. He was crying because I was crying and I was crying because I was dying.

"Ricky" I screamed my vision blurry from tears.

My monitors start going off again but they weren't any louder than the ringing in my head or the sound of my heart shattering to pieces.

"Amy" my mother sighed sympathetically as my dad consoled John.

"Mom go get Ricky" I said hoarsely "tell him its okay, tell him he doesn't have to leave me" I cried as she put her arms around me.

"Amy he's doing what he thinks is right" she said rubbing my back. "He's putting your safety first."

I cried harder pissed that my mom wouldn't get him. How dare she think this was right.

"Get out!" I screamed at them "I don't want you here" I said pushing my mother's arms away.

"Amy we're just-"

"LEAVE!" I barreled out loudly as the doctors were putting something in my IV.

My eyes got heavy and I punched the mattress on my hospital bed upset that I couldn't fight my sleep.

**A/N I'll be making corrections tomorrow when I do a re-read I was just so anxious to post.**


	8. In the Rain

***All rights are to Brenda Hampton & Co. I'm not a thief lol. But the plot is mine and Brenda you can steal if you want to lol.***

**Chapter 8: In the Rain**

**Ricky POV**

"Hello" the voice said on the other end of my call.

"Hello?" she repeated.

I took a deep breath and heard her sniffle.

"Ricky?" I heard her whisper.

I just held the phone to my ear. I shouldn't have called but I wanted to hear her voice. I wanted to imagine she was here with me right now.

"Ricky, I love you" I heard her say before she sniffled again. "Please let me come home" she sighed.

I closed my eyes as if that could hold my tears in. I pulled the phone from my ear and closed it. I threw it onto the couch before sitting down and rubbing my neck. _This is hell_ I thought.

It's been a couple weeks since Amy last seen me. I used to sneak in to see her when she slept, I'd hold her hand and maybe steal a kiss than leave. She caught me last week when I was outside of her room talking to her doctor.

*Flashback*

"_Ricky if you have a question about my health why don't you come in and ask me"_ she had said thru frustrated tears in her eyes.

She was standing at the door holding tightly to her iv pole with her hand on her wound. My eyes softened at the sight of her. She looked so tired and hurt her eyes were puffy and her cheeks were red. Yet she still looked so beautiful. I kept telling myself that this was for the best with my crazy dad still after me, but it was starting to feel so wrong.

"_I have to go and you should be in bed"_ I told her harshly to keep up the charade.

"_Ricky just talk to me come in here and I promise I'll go to bed." _she said fighting off her doctor who was leading her back into the room.

"_Ricky" _she huffed with pleading eyes.

"_I don't think that's a good Idea Amy_" I said turning away leaving her for the second time.

I got in my car that day and screamed. I hated this I hated hurting her and it was all that bastards fault. I was so sick of him popping up in my life.

*End of Flashback*

Twelve years later and he was still controlling me.

**Amy**

My mother was talking to me about Ashley and Robie, but hearing about them wasn't cheering me up. It was actually annoying me; I turned my head looking out the window at the storm clouds forming. It was supposed to be a severe thunderstorm tonight and everyone was cautioned to stay home. Yet, here my mother was bothering me.

I gave her the occasional head nod so she would think I was paying attention; but my thoughts drifted back to Ricky and the last conversation we had.

He left me standing there again looking like a fool as he walked off. It wasn't over I could tell by the look in his eyes he was in as much pain as I was. I had to get to him show him that I'm strong and we can protect each other. I had to show him that our love was enough to conquer all. I thought back to the phone call we had after the first time he left.

*Flashback*

"_Amy, you gotta stop calling me it's only gonna make things harder." _he said hoarsely and I could tell he'd been crying.

"_Ricky I'd be safer with you not without you" _I reasoned and there was long pause and I thought my words had broke through.

"_Amy, when we're older and you get to see John walk across that stage you'll thank me for this." _he stated.

My frustration had boiled over and I snapped at him.

"_Ricky you can't make my choices for me!" _I snapped.

"_Amy I'm not gonna be the reason you die" _he said sternly.

I was losing it.

"_When did you stop believing?" _I cried. Again there was silence and I heard sniffling.

"_When I held your lifeless body in my hands" _his voice cracked _"Bye Amy please stop calling."_

I slammed the phone down and buried my face in my pillows and cried.

*End of Flashback*

It's been 2 weeks since Ricky left me since that phone call and the pain wasn't getting easier. The doctors came in to continue on with my pain medication regimen, but no amount of meds could heal a broken heart…

* * *

><p><strong>Ricky<strong>

Bang…

I jumped as I heard the thunder and clouds open up. It was suppose to be a bad storm tonight so I made sure I got off early enough to get John. I thought for sure the sound of the thunder would have woke him up, but I guess I'm the only chicken in the house.

I laughed at myself for a few minutes before I heard a faint knock on the door. I waited to see if I was just going crazy but the knock came again.

"Who goes out in the middle of a thunderstorm?" I thought as I twisted the knob.

"Amy" I squealed opening the door all the way. She was soaking wet in her hospital gown with a yellow sweater over it.

"I just had to see you" she mumbled weakly before losing her balance and falling into my arms.

I kicked the door closed and carried her over to the bed.

"Amy what are you doing here how did you get here?" I asked pulling a blanket around her could body she was shivering.

"I walked" she croaked scooting in closer to me to catch my body heat.

"You what" I asked in disbelief.

"I walked" she said a little louder.

"You walked 5 miles in the middle of a thunderstorm are you crazy" I yelled.

"I would walk a 1000 miles if it meant I could get your attention" she said now looking me in the eye.

"Amy you're in no condition to be out of the hospital let alone in a storm, you could have been hurt-"

"I'm already hurt" she said as a tear ran down her cheek.

I already knew what she meant and I immediately felt guilty the hurt in her voice was unbearable.

"Ricky I don't care if I even died out there, because I'd rather be dead than live without you" she continued through tears.

I was crying now as I pulled her into me "Amy don't say things like that you have a lot to live for you have John." I said rubbing her back.

"I know I was thinking selfishly, but you promised you wouldn't leave me" she said helplessly looking into my eyes.

My heart was breaking and I didn't know what to do. I ran my hands through her wet hair and kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry" was all I could choke out.

"Don't be sorry, just stop shutting me out Ricky. I'm stronger than you think" she smiled cupping my face.

I stared her for what seemed like forever. The old me battling the person I was trying to be. They say old habits die hard and this had to be one of those moments. I wanted so badly to let her in to not hold anything back I just don't know how.

I got off the bed and led her to the bathroom. She looked at me confused.

"We gotta get you out of these wet clothes" I told her. "I don't think you can be sick right now."

She nodded as she went in and I got one of my shirts for her to wear. I walked in and saw her standing in front of the mirror struggling to get the gown over her head.

"Hey I got it" I said standing behind her as I gently lifted the wet material over her head. My eyes lingered over her body as I seen the bruising on her side from the stitches from her surgery.

I felt the pressure of my tears against my eyes as I gently rubbed the wound. Then my eyes drifted between her legs. There were about 8 slashes from the top to her mid thigh. Four on each side and the lowest ones looked the deepest seeing as they needed stitches. I dropped my head into her hair at the sight caressing her and let out a few tears.

"It's okay Ricky" she sobbed "I'm safe now I'm with you" she said turning into me.

She raised my head to face her and placed a kiss on my lips. I instinctively pulled her closer deepening the kiss. She opened her mouth a little and my tongue met hers. I broke the kiss and went down and kissed each scar on her thigh. In my mind I was kissing away her pain. I worked way back up with subtle stops in between, and reacquainted myself with her lips. Her arms wrapped around my neck and I lifted her onto the sink. She whimpered in pain bringing us back into reality.

"It's too soon for this" I sighed letting her down.

"No, it's okay" she assured.

I shook my head.

"No Amy you're hurt I don't want hurt you anymore." I whispered.

I pulled my shirt over her head and lead her back to the sofa bed.

"Ricky I know you don't want to be with me, but will you hold me just for tonight." she said quietly.

I got in the bed and enwrapped her in my arms. She snuggled in close to me laying her head on my chest. I knew I missed her presence, but until tonight I didn't know how badly. I wanted to tell her right then and there to forget the past couple of weeks and that she could come home. I wanted to tell her that I didn't mean what I said. But I couldn't I was afraid; I was afraid the next time my father beat the legal system the results would be fatal. I couldn't live with myself if I knew John and Amy were hurt or killed because of me.

I looked into her eyes holding her as close as I could to me. I watched as she let herself sleep probably the best sleep she's had in about 3 months. I would hold even if it was just for tonight. I would figure out all the hard stuff tomorrow.

When I was sure she was asleep I gently slid out of our embrace. I put on my shoes and jacket and walked out of the apartment, out of the butcher shop. I stood in the rain and let out all the tears I'd been holding in the last 3 months. I let out the anger, the frustration, the hurt, and the worry. I let out the burden of guilt I'd been holding since I was 5 years old and the pain.

As crazy as it sounds I felt God was cleansing me. He was using the rain to wash away the sins that had and hadn't been my fault. I've never been super religious but we all have to believe in something.

I don't know how long I stood out in the rain and cried that night, but when I finally came back in the weight of the world didn't seem so heavy.

Maybe love is enough…

**A/N this was actually part of Chapter 7 but i decided to break them up so it wouldn't be too long. I'm re-reading tomorrow ro fix mistakes;)**


	9. You Can't Win

***All characters belong to Brenda Hampton & Co. I own nothing, but the plot. I'm back! I found a little inspiration today I hope the chapter isn't as sucky as I think it is. Writer's Block is no fun, alas enjoy the story my love bugs;)***

**Chapter 9: You Can't Win**

I looked at Amy as she slept she looked so gorgeous. I watched as her chest rose up and down signaling that she was breathing, and the little smile on her face. She moved quite a bit during the night I would assume from nightmares, but I made sure to hold her tight so she would know I'm here for her. The whole thing is kind of crazy since usually I'm the troubled sleeper and she's there to help me. The clock was just hitting 8 a.m and I knew John would be up any minute wanting breakfast. I sighed and turned my attention back to Amy her cheeks were so flushed and I seen little beads of sweat forming on her forehead. I swiftly brushed her hair back and touched my lips to her forehead she was burning up.

"Ames" I shook her a little to wake her up.

"What's going on" she asked bewildered

"We got to get you back to the hospital you're burning up" I said shuffling to get my pants on.

"No, Ricky I don't want to go back I'll be fine I-I can just take an aspirin." she rationalized.

"Oh you're going back! You could have pneumonia or an infection you should have never left." I said a little louder than I wanted to.

"Promise me if I go back you'll come see" she pleaded still in the same spot.

"Amy, come on we don't have time for-" before I could finish I heard loud banging on the door.

"Ricky open up" Anne called from outside the door.

"No don't don't answer" Amy whispered loudly.

"Hey Anne" I said opening the door.

"I knew she was here, Amy you know you're not well enough to be out of the hospital lets go" she demanded.

"No, Ricky's taking me back" she eyed me now standing.

"I think your mom should take you Amy" I voiced lowly.

"But Ricky" she protested.

"Amy, I still have to get John up and ready and you're running a fever, plus your mom is already here." I tried to justify.

She rolled her eyes as a tear escaped. "Fine!" she hissed grabbing a pair of sweatpants.

"Thanks, Ricky" Anne smiled as they were walking out. Amy glared at her than me.

"I'll stop by later...with John I promise" I let out a small smile.

She softened and gave a half smile back.

* * *

><p>Amy<p>

I sat in silence as they gave me another dose of poison. At least Ricky was coming later with John thinking about my two boys always brings a smile to my face.

"Amy I know you miss Ricky, but you can't sneak out of the hospital risking your health to see him" my mother scolded.

"You don't understand" I screamed. "I need him okay I don't know if I can make it without him mom" i said so low I don't even think I heard myself.

"Amy I understand you love him, but you can live without him. You have to learn to be more independent Ricky will come around he's scared right now." she soothed.

"Okay maybe I can live without him, but I don't want to. I don't want to sleep in a bed without him. I don't want John to be wondering why we aren't at home with his daddy." I sniffled.

"Don't you think the best way to get Ricky back is to show him you're strong enough whether you guys are together or apart?" she furrowed her brow.

"But that's a lie. I feel like I'm suffocating without him and that's just during the day. At night its even worst" I said turning my head towards the window.

"Amy what happened while you were there?" my mom questioned almost afraid to ask.

I stayed silent for awhile hoping she wouldn't push it. I wanted to forget what happened. I wanted to go back to be the little mommy and the little soon to be wife. I didn't want to talk about that monster I hated that in a few months I would have to see him in court to testify.

"Amy?" she asked pulling me out my daze.

"I don't know what you're talking about" I chirped leaning back into my pillow.

"What?" she asked confused.

"I...don't...know...what YOU'RE talking about okay" I said annoyed.

She looked at me for a moment before she spoke, probably trying to figure out on a scale of 1-10 how crazy I am.

"I'm gonna go speak with your doctor, then I'm going to run home and check on Robie. You should rest." she hurried kissing my forehead.

"If that's all it takes to get her to leave me alone maybe I should do it more often." I sadly chuckled to myself closing my eyes.

Ricky

I sat John in his little booster to seat so he could reach the table.

"You want Captain Crunch or Lucky Charms buddy" I said holding each box up.

He looked as if he was in deep thought for a few minutes before he said Marshmallows.

"Okay Lucky Charms it is" I smiled pouring a little milk over his cereal.

"Daddy go get mommy today?" he questioned raising an eyebrow.

"No not today bud, but we'll go visit her later alright" I assured.

"I want mommy to come home" he said as he slammed his spoon in his bowl.

"I know John, but mommy has to get better first than she'll be able to go home." I tried to refrain from saying "come home" because I still wasn't sure which home she was coming to. I want her here but at the same time I think her and John would be safer at her parents house. Then again seeing Amy so shattered last night made me think I was doing more harm than good. Maybe we could work together.

* * *

><p>I held John's hand as I signed in to visit Amy.<p>

"Daddy" she whined tugging my arm.

"Hold on little man I'm almost done" he laughed.

"I want to go play with the toys" he begged pointing to the corner with the train sets and race cars.

"Okay, but stay there and don't move" I ordered as he ran off happily.

"She should be good to go soon" the attendee(sp) said smiling at me.

"I hope so" I said returning the same smile.

I went over to grab John and we headed down the long hallway. John tripped so I bent over to tie his shoe when someone bumped into me.

"Sorry" the figure murmured moving quickly away from me and out the door.

He had on all black with a hoodie and baseball cap on. Any other day I wouldn't care but I thought it was odd since it is 95 degrees outside.

"That's weird" I told John continuing our walk down the hallway.

"Totally" he said furrowing his eyebrows.

I laughed really hard at that this kid was some character. I couldn't wait to tell Amy about the exchange. I walked over to her bed and she was sleeping as peacefully as this morning. I dumped John on the bed with her and noticed some flowers on her side table.

I raised my eyebrow and grabbed the card attached with the lilly and daisy mix arrangement.

_Sorry our rendezvous didn't end on a better note. Trust me next time will end up way better, for me I mean. Make sure you heal up good cant wait to play again, it's only the beginning. -Bob_

**Okay that's Chapter 9 I hope everything came out okay my Microsoft office expired so I had to use Notepad. I'll check back later for mistakes. Anywho this was kind of a filler so get ready for more drama!**


	10. Deja Vu

***The following characters you read about in this AWESOME story are all owned by the great BRENDA HAMPTON who brought us the AWESOMENESS! That is RAMY I just got bored over this devastating hiatus lol. Also thanks so much for the reviews I really appreciate them especially SweetLaura79 and SecretLifeFan13 who have been with this story from the beginning(review wise) since I know not everyone reviews;)***

**Chapter 10: Déjà Vu**

I stood there for a moment observing the card. This could not be happening, just when I cave and think to let Amy come back he hits me with this note.

"Ricky, what's that?" Amy asked rubbing her eyes.

"Oh its nothing" I said casually sliding the card into my pocket.

"Aww the flowers are beautiful, you shouldn't have" her eyes brightened as she looked between me and the dozens of lilies and daisies.

_I didn't _I thought as I planted on a nervous smile.

"You know they're letting me go home today." she fiddled with her fingers avoiding my eyes.

I looked down at my own hands not really wanting to engage in this conversation.

"Do you want me to bring you some clothes over to your parents." I veered my eyes up slowly.

"So you're seriously not letting me come back home." her voice laced with disappointment.

"Amy…"

"What are you hiding from me? I told you we're stronger together than apart." persuasion turning into anger.

"I know and I-" I began.

"So what's the damn problem Ricky" she whispered loudly agitated.

"I just need a little more time just to get things under control." I reasoned.

"No. No we are not going back that road again. If you make me go to my parents Ricky I'm not ever coming home." she said with a seriousness that shook me to my core.

I couldn't stand the sight of her hurt eyes piercing me any longer so I turned to leave. I heard her punch her bed angrily.

"I'll be back later to get John" I said sullen.

"Ricky…"

I heard the sound of glass shattering as the door closed. I'm glad those flowers weren't from me.

**Amy**

"Ooooh mommy you broke the flowers you gone get in trouble." John said gasping and pointing to the pile of dirt on the hospital floor.

My anger subsided as I giggled and pulled him closer to me.

"Nope I'm gonna tell everyone you did it." I whispered kissing his cheek.

He gasped again as he gave me the evil eye.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with you John Juergens." I crossed my arms and he laughed.

"Hey Amy" I looked up to greet the person at the door.

"Karlee how are you?" I said with a genuine smile. It's time to let the past go after almost losing my life I learned that holding a grudge isn't doing anything, but hurting me.

"I'm good I just wanted to check on you. I would have came earlier but I've been so caught up with the police that I didn't have time."

"It's okay I understand. I'll probably have to do the same thing when I get discharged later." I shrugged. "Come, come sit."

She sat down and looked as if she wanted to share something with me but wasn't quite sure she should.

"Is that all you wanted?" I questioned.

"I also wanted to thank you for not pressing charges about…you know me threatening you." she half smiled.

"Water under the bridge." I laughed light heartedly.

"Hey John" she said taking his little hand into his.

"Hi" he replied curling into me. I smiled.

"He's a little shy" I shared.

"He's too adorable" she smiled then it faded. "It's something else I wanted to tell you."

"Shoot" I said then peered down at my gunshot wound and frowned. "Not literally though" I sighed.

She frowned at what I was looking at before continuing. "I met up with Ricky a few weeks ago at the park…"

My mouth dropped she better not say she slept with my husband. I mean fiance? Or whatever we are now. I'm going to kill her.

"He wanted to know about what happened when we were in _there."_ she said quickly probably noticing the scowl on my face.

"Oh?" I trailed off. _So that's why he's refusing me to come home_ I thought.

"Yea he wanted to know if, Bob touched you." she hesitated saying the last part a little above a whisper.

"Oh…" I nodded not knowing what to say. I knew she wanted me to give her an exact yes or no. But in life there are gray areas.

"Well" she asked impatient. "I don't want to pry and I promise I won't tell Ricky, but we did get food one time" she motioned.

I looked over at John who had fallen asleep in my arms. I kissed his forehead gently. My baby I would do anything for him even…

"Amy!" she tapped me out of my daydream.

"Sorry, and no he didn't rape me. H-he just made me kiss him." I gulped trying to avoid the bile crawling up my throat.

"And that's it I don't want to speak of it anymore." I warned.

"Okay, okay." she held up her hands.

"Knock, knock" a voice said coming in.

Just the person I didn't want to see. "Hi Adrian" I grumbled.

"Hey Amy." she slid in.

"Well, I bet if Ricky was here he'd feel very uncomfortable." I chuckled at the ghosts of girlfriends past and present.

Adrian and Karlee both let out awkward laughs as we continued to stare at each other.

"This is really weird." Adrian threw in.

"Definitely" Karlee added looking down at the pile of glass and dirt on the floor.

"What happened with that" Adrian said on que.

"Um, nothing I was just mad Ricky." I shrugged.

"Everything okay with you guys" Adrian asked in curiosity.

"Yes Adrian everything is fine" I said harshly.

"Look Amy, I know I never really apologized for trying to steal him and I am sorry. I will always love Ricky but I'm not "in love" with him I just needed a distraction from my reality. I'm sorry I ruined our new formed friendship especially after you were there for me" she trailed off.

"Look after going through hell I've learned to let things go. As much as I wanna sit here and say things are honkey doory between us I don't think they ever can be." I said honestly. "I want to forgive you Adrian I do, but I also want to forget you. Nothing personal I just don't need the stress.

"I understand" she said quietly.

"You know if I didn't love Ricky as much as I do I would suggest we do a 'John Tucker Must Die' on him" I giggled trying to lighten the mood.

We all laughed and continued to talk for the next couple of hours.

* * *

><p><strong>Ricky<strong>

I spent the last few hours riding around town in search of something. For what? I didn't quite know. I finally gave in and drove home after seeing I was running out of gas I didn't have time to be stranded in the middle of nowhere. As I approached my door I fumbled with my keys my mind was so scattered by the note. I walked in quickly and pulled the note out and gave it a once over before hitting the lights.

"Oh shit" I screamed dropping my keys and the card.

"Hello Ricky." she said seductively with a grin.

"A-Ashley what are you doing here" I stammered out nervously. "And why are you here sitting in the dark? Are you trying to kill me? I could have a gun or somethin' with the craziness that has been going on!" I yelled.

Which was partially true although I ignorantly left the gun I just picked up in the car. _Way to go Einstein_ I thought to myself.

"Stop being dramatic being with Amy has made you so…sensitive" she teased walking towards me.

I rolled my eyes "Whatever Amy's still at the hospital and when she's discharged this evening she'll be at your parents house." I in formed her taking a seat on the couch. Her being that close to me was making me uncomfortable.

"I didn't come here for Amy I came here for you. I wanted to talk to you ; I heard you called things off with Amy.

I laughed sickly in my head because I still considered Amy and I a couple. We would never be truly broken up, at least that's how I saw it. Amy has always been my girlfriend in a way even when I was with Adrian, that's just how we always treated each other. We could bash on each other all we wanted, but if an outsider tried to come into our little family the guards were up.

I noticed Ashley staring at me waiting for a response so I decided to humor her. "And…"

She smiled. "And I was wondering where that leaves us?"

At first I thought she was kidding so I smirked, then I realized she was very serious so it left my face.

"Ashley you can't be serious right now." I said appalled.

"Ricky we had something that summer and you know it." she stated.

"Ashley can we not do this right now. Your sister almost died because of me for peeks sake! Are you seriously wishing that was you." I asked astonished.

"If it meant you loved me yes!" she declared.

"Ashley!"

"Ricky!"

I really didn't want to do this. I didn't want to hurt her, but she was really pushing my last nerves with thins stupid crush. I tried one last attempt to get thru to her.

"Ashley. I thought we agreed to be friends and leave that behind us." I pleaded.

She folded her arms. "Ricky we can't be friends I love you."

"Ashley I don't love you." I softly touched her shoulder.

"But you said not to forget that kiss."

I interrupted her. "I said lets not because it was wrong and it could never happen again. I was ashamed because I used you and hurt Amy."

"You didn't use me! I kissed you and we wanted kiss each other." she said defensively.

"Okay, but we wanted to kiss each other for different reasons. You kissed me because you loved me. I kissed you…because you were a girl and I was me and my hormones took over."

"What about when I came over to sleep with you and you said you could have, would have, and should have been the one I would end up with!" she was standing now with her hands on her hips.

"Ashley I said all that because I didn't want to hurt your feelings. I still wanted us to be friends and I was afraid if I told you the truth, well you can't handle the truth." I shrugged biting my lip.

"What's the truth" she asked eyes glassy.

"The truth is even if Amy didn't have John I don't think I would have been interested in you or tried to get to know you…in the matter we did. If anything I would have ended up hurting you by sleeping with you and never acknowledging you again." I stuck my hands in my pocket and looked down.

She wiped a tear and cleared her throat. "Well at least your were honest." she smiled sadly.

"I'm sorry Ashley I love our friendship, but if I could I would take that kiss back. When I kissed you I knew I wanted to try to make it work with Amy, but I kissed you anyway. Everyone may think I only love Amy because of John, but the truth is its always been Amy always. Even before I knew of John."

"I understand." she said with a more genuine smile. "Every girl should have a Ricky in their life, I guess its about time I find my own."

I smiled "I hope you do Ash. You deserve it."

"Maybe now I can finally open up to Toby like I should have a long time ago." she chuckled softly.

"I hope you're not talking about sex" I said in full brother mode.

She laughed and kissed my cheek. "That my friend is none of your concern" she said heading out the door.

_That damn Ashley _I shook my head picking up the card and my keys.

The hand writing definitely looked familiar, but it wasn't Bob's.

**I will proofread tonight I just was anxious to post so sorry in advance for mistakes. **


	11. Welcome Back

**** All Secret Life characters belong to Brenda Hampton & Co, but I'm sure by now you all know that.****

**Chapter 11: Welcome Back**

**Amy**

"Amy your family is waiting for you in the waiting room, your mom had to fill out some paper work." the chipper nurse Amber said.

I nodded my head and pulled my shoes on. I was going home today I should have been ecstatic, but it wasn't the home I wanted to go to. I looked around the room I had been inhabiting for the last month and grabbed my duffle bag. I grazed across my nearly healed gunshot wound and tensed, it was still a little sore.

"This is it" I mumbled to myself closing the door and heading down the hallway.

It was Friday afternoon and Ricky offered to bring John over later even though it was his day. I assumed we'd be going back to our normal custody agreement and John would be returning home with Ricky after dinner.

"Hey Ames, you ready?" my dad asked in an unusual jovial tone.

Which just irritated me because my mood was anything but happy. I was hurt and pissed at Ricky he was a hypocrite. He always reminded me that I was not his mother, but here he was acting like my father. He was making all my decisions for me because he didn't trust me. He still didn't trust me and that's what hurt the most, and I hated it.

We walked to the car in silence and I spent the majority of the time looking out the window. Somewhere between all this madness I found peace looking out into the horizon. I always liked watching the moon, but now its like I needed to stare out windows and embrace nature. I guess being cooped up in a storage unit will do that to you.

"Ames you okay?" my dad asked as we turned onto our street.

That was a simple question so why was it so hard to answer. Am I okay, physically I suppose emotionally not so much.

"Yea, dad just trying to readjust." I shrugged getting out the car.

I opened the door and felt like I was in the twilight zone. People started popping out of every corner yelling surprise. Ben, Grace, Jack, Ashley, Griffin, Grant, Madison, Lauren, Adrian, and Ricky; there he was standing in the corner with John and now my mother. I turned and gave my father the evil eye as I went straight to my room and slammed the door. I should have seen this coming my parents are so over the top.

"I told you this wasn't a good idea" George whispered to Anne.

"I thought she'd be happy seeing her friends." Anne shrugged.

"The kids heartbroken right now. I think the only thing she wants to do is dip into a big tub of Ben & Jerry's" George chuckled.

"I'll go talk to her." Ashley offered walking away. "Oh and you might want to get rid of these people. Especially him." she stopped and eyed Ricky.

They both nodded and started their apologies to their guests.

**Ricky**

"Maybe I should have just dropped John off." I said putting him down to play with Moose.

I knew Amy probably didn't want to see me since I was dodging her calls, but I just had to see her. What I was doing was unfair to everyone, but in the long run I knew she'd thank me.

"No I don't think it was your presence exactly that ticked her off I think it was you guys' situation all together" George chimed in.

I nodded and was about to say something else when someone called me.

"Hey Ricky" a voice said tapping my shoulder.

I turned and was face to face with Adrian. She had her hands in her back pockets and lowered her head. I was in no mood to entertain her I told her a long time ago that I didn't want anything to do with her, and she still didn't get the hint.

"What do you want Adrian." I said coldly crossing my arms.

"I just wanted to apologize for my past behavior." she replied almost ashamed.

"Look, I told you before I don't want you in my life too much has happened now." I said annoyed.

"Its just we're both going to the same college, and it's a new place where we'd have to adjust. I thought that maybe we could adjust together as friends." She said sheepishly.

She was halfway right when you go to a new place its good to have a familiar face around, I just didn't want that face to be hers. Adrian would only bring trouble to my life and I knew that, but I still felt that guilt inside of me from how I treated her. That guilt is what makes it so hard to really go off on her like I should.

" You just don't know when to stop do you?" I let out a cynical laugh. "Unbelievable."

"I'm serious I already spoke with Amy and -"

"Wait what? You talked to Amy is that why she's upset what did you say to her." I said viciously on the defense.

"Ricky calm down I didn't say anything that would upset her. In fact I told her the same thing I'm telling you, that I'm sorry." she shot back.

"Oh, it doesn't matter anyway. I meant what I said at graduation we should just steer clear from each other. A friendship between the two of us would not be good." I reasoned.

"But we were friends before all that would be missing is the sex. You can deny it all you want but I know our friendship meant something. We had something deeper than sex." she declared.

I was really starting to lose my patience with her. Why did she have to make everything so difficult. This was another reason on the long list of why we would never work out she's too damn spoiled. Its Adrian's way or no way and that is how it will always be with who ever she was in a relationship with.

"It meant something. A long time ago until you betrayed my trust. I don't trust you Adrian especially when you practically threatened to rape me one of these days. Leave me alone, leave Amy alone and live your life. Maybe someday things will change but right now being friends with you is the least of my worries." I said leaving her there hurt.

**Amy **

"Amy can I come in?" I heard Ashley asking as she knocked on the door.

"Go away" I yelled my face buried in a pillow.

To my surprise she took my blatant request as an invitation in.

"What do you want Ashley" my face still in my pillow.

"For you to get up and grow up." she said pulling me to face her.

"Wow are you really telling me how to act?" I snipped.

"Yes, I am what do you think your little tantrum accomplished Amy? That's right nothing." she said sarcastically.

"I didn't want a party I still don't. I just wish everyone would leave me alone and stay out my business!" I hissed at her.

"Ricky is going to come around he still considers you two together and obviously so do you since you're still sporting your ring." she said pointing to my left finger.

I looked at my ring and rubbed it. I smiled thinking back to graduation and seeing him on one knee. Ricky Underwood was on bended knee for me I would have never expected that. Of course I knew he may be planning to propose, but I didn't know it would be that soon and I definitely didn't think he would actually get down on one knee. He's so incredible and surprises me with his love everyday. My smile faded as I looked at the ring again and thought about when I woke up in the hospital and it was missing. The panic that shot through my body and the breaths that became shallow as I screamed rampantly for it. A tear ran down my eye as I slid the ring off and put it on my night stand.

"There all gone" I said glaring at Ashley. She just stared at me shocked I took it off.

"You can leave now" I said harshly but softened. "I just wanna take a quick shower and nap I'm exhausted." I gave her a weak smile.

She nodded and went to the door and turned to look at me one more time before exiting completely. I sat in the spot a few more minutes thinking of everything and nothing at the same time. The trial was coming up soon and I just wanted to disappear. Bob Underwood was the last person I ever wanted to come in contact with again trial or no trial.

* * *

><p>I hopped out the shower and tip-toed to my room. Ricky was with John in his old room and I didn't want him to see me. I'd been avoiding him for the past few hours only leaving my room when dinner was ready and I didn't even look his way. When I got to my room I closed the door and stretched across my bed. I looked over at my night stand where my engagement ring still lay perfectly still and bit my lip. I glanced back and forth between my naked left ring finger and my ring. After a couple seconds I grabbed my ring and put it back on; this ring was my little glimmer of hope when I was locked up. It was my saving grace that I'd be reunited with the people I love, it didn't abandon me so I'll never abandon it.<p>

I smiled and admired it on my finger before getting up and grabbing some clothes from my drawers. I let loose my wild mane that had evolved into deep brown sea waves. I never wore my hair curly and I didn't feel like straightening it for 2 hrs so I figured I'd let it air dry. I dropped my other towel and put on my undergarments. It hurt to bend down to slide my shorts on, but when I got to the point of slipping into my shirt my body was on fire. I guess I overdid it because the excruciating pain was causing me to get dizzy and I felt my self stumble back into something solid.

"Hey, hey I got you let me help." I heard a voice say that I was deeply trying to avoid.

Ricky wrapped one arm loosely around my torso and pulled the shirt gently over my head. After he helped me get comfortable in my clothes I pulled away.

"I could have done it myself" I snapped now facing him.

"Yea you were doing so great that you almost fell and gave yourself a concussion" he said sarcastically.

"Why are you even in here and how long have you been even standing there" I put my hands on my hips as my eyes narrowed.

He stood silent with that guilty expression on his face.

"Ah ha so you were being a peeping Tom I see." he still stood silent.

I shook my head and sat down on my bed.

"I figured you'd need some help so I followed you in here. I didn't want you to bust your stitches or strain yourself." he sighed.

"I don't get you. You don't want me home or to be together, but you wanna come here and take care of me." I rolled my eyes.

"I know it sounds dumb and I'm sorry, maybe I was wrong. Maybe you should be home…with me." he lowered his head.

"No!" I said coldly.

"No?" he asked confused.

"Ricky this isn't a game. I told you if you made me come home here that I wasn't coming back and I meant that." I stated fluttering my eyelashes.

"Are you serious right now?" he groaned.

"Yes I said I didn't want to do the back and forth thing like my parents. I thought we were in this together." my voice cracked. "You banishing me from our home let me know you still don't trust me to be there for you. You're still afraid to let me in even after I promised you I wouldn't leave you and I could handle it. You still left me out in the cold." I had tears in my eyes as I stood up to face him. "You're a hypocrite you don't want me to help or make decisions for you, but what are you doing to me."

**Ricky**

I didn't know what to say she was right. I was shutting her out, and I am a hypocrite. I had to have control over ever thing in my life that way I wouldn't get hurt; or I would just hurt myself before someone else hurt me so it would be less painful. I should have just let Amy come home I don't know what I was thinking this whole situation had my thought process all messed up and I was making irrational decisions in the name of love.

"You're right." I said softly avoiding her glassy eyes. "I'm hypocrite but its different than you making decisions about college for me. This was totally different!"

"How!" she said frustrated.

"Because!" I shouted back. "Because my life didn't depend on that decision and the one I made for you did. Do you know what seeing you limp in my arms did to me Amy? Did you know what going home after rushing you to the hospital and seeing myself completely covered in _your_ blood did to my sanity? I felt bile crawl up my throat as I thought back to that image.

She stood there speechless as hot tears continued to roll down her flushed cheeks.

"Did you even know that you died on the operating table because you lost so much blood and you were so weak? All because of me and _my _problems my past. If they hadn't got those blood infusions in you and you would have died Amy I don't know what I would have done. Well I do know what I would have done, but it would have been selfish and you wouldn't have liked it." I said giving out a sad snicker and wiping a stray tear from her eyes. Holding back my own.

"So I'm sorry if I made decisions for you that you didn't like, but I can't have your blood on my hands again." I exhaled.

She looked at me for a moment as her eyes softened. The angry tears now transforming into sad, hurt regretful ones. She moved forward and showered me with love in one embrace.

"I love you Ricky" she whispered in my ear.

"I love you too." I smiled inhaling her scent.

"I don't ever want you to think otherwise okay." she said pulling back and looking at me very seriously.

"I know you love me Amy why would I think otherwise?" I questioned.

She took my hand and we sat on her bed. She took a deep breath and looked into my eyes with those beautiful hazel eyes that spoke to my soul.

"When we were struggling for the gun and it went off and shot me its like my life flashed before my eyes. She giggled for a second before continuing. "I know it sounds strange and it was strange to me because I always thought crazy things like that only happened in movies. I thought back to John and you. To all the times we shared together… good and bad" she said somber.

"The bad times don't matter to me anymore Amy its in the past." I said kissing her hand.

"No let me finish" she smiled sadly.

I could tell it was something weighing heavily on her mind, but I didn't know what. I nodded my head for her to continue.

"I remembered all the bad moments we shared and it seemed like it almost outweighed the good and that hurt me more than the bullet." she sniffled taking a deep breath. "Ricky I told you I hated you and I didn't mean that. All I kept thinking was I'm dying and he's going to think I hated him." she rambled.

"It's okay" I stroked her hair.

"No its not okay." she yelled. "It was a lie. I didn't hate you and I know it still bothers you that I said that. I was mad at you because you said if it wasn't Adrian it'll be someone else. I was jealous because you didn't say me, you didn't want to be with me and that hurt me. It hurt me because I cared about you, so I wanted to hurt you back so I said I hated you and I saw the tears well up in your eyes and I instantly regretted it." she sighed.

"I only said that to get a rise out of you" I said lightly laughing. "I knew we had some kind of weird relationship thing going on since the summer Ben went away and maybe before. I just wanted you to admit it so I wouldn't feel stupid. I wanted you to tell me you loved me too, but my plan backfired. I can laugh now but when you said it then I felt a pain inside of me that I couldn't describe." I said honestly.

"I'm sorry I said that Ricky, and I want you to know I'll never say it again no matter how mad at each other we get. I never want you to feel like I don't love you or I don't appreciate the things you do for me and John because I do." she said sweetly and kissed my lips.

I smiled. It felt good to hear Amy say that I always feel like I'm not doing enough for them, or I'm doing something wrong. I was happy to hear that I was doing everything mostly right.

"Thanks Amy and I don't want you to think I don't trust you because I do. I trust you with my life and I know you can handle me and my past I just want to protect you from it. When I'm with you I feel like somebody I can be proud of, someone worthy of all the great things happening in my life. The best part of me Amy is you and John." I rubbed her cheek.

"You're a great man Ricky Underwood if I had a choice to do things differently the only thing I'd change is not being able to see it sooner." she smiled.

I leaned in for an innocent kiss, but it soon turned sinful. I hadn't had sex in almost 3 months and I was extremely horny. I pulled Amy unto my lap gently and deepened the kiss.

**Amy**

I straddled over Ricky and laced my hands in his thick hair kneading it as the kiss deepened. I wanted him so bad that the ecstasy in my body was overruling the constant pain from my wounds. I moaned gently on his mouth as I sucked on his bottom lip harvesting the sweet taste they had on them. It let me know that he had just eaten some of my welcome home cake and it was delicious. I felt his hand playing in my hair as the other moved lower playing with the top of my shorts I just worked so hard to put on.

"Ricky" I sighed seductively as he moved from my lips to my neck lightly nibbling on every inch.

My breath hitched as his cold fingers met the warm moist spot between my legs that I could only describe as global warming. I threw my head back as he sucked on the top of my chest fingers still marching in my platoon. The pleasure I was feeling was unbearable and I felt the raging waters breaking through the dam as I released an earth shattering gasp. He smirked at me as he removed his shirt then mine. I seen that gleam in his eyes and I knew I was going to be sore in the morning.

**Ricky**

I put my finger on Amy's lips and kissed it letting her know we had to be quiet. She smiled and pushed me down on the bed as she did a little strip tease removing her shorts and panties. She was teasing me and I could feel the sweat beads forming on my forehead. I needed her now she walked back towards me and removed my pants rubbing the growth between my boxers.

"Come on Amy." I said breathless. "Don't make me beg."

She smiled and bit her lip as she lowered herself on top of me ravishing my lips. Our tongues were like sumo wrestlers each trying to win the match. I flipped her over and got on top and admired the scenary. My eyes danced all over her beautiful olive skin lightly tanned; her wounds were almost non-existent now and the marks between her legs had all but healed. Leaving only a light pink mark that would go away soon enough. She covered them self consciously as she noticed my eyes studying them and I removed her hands and kissed them.

"I love you." I whispered still focused at the tasks at hand loving every inch of her treasure till I reached her lips again. I stopped and showed her my scars on my body and let her know that there's nothing she has to hide from me and she attacked my lips again.

"I want you" she moaned getting impatient and I slid in slowly and began my pace.

I closed my eyes as each thrust I made she matched back. We were in our own little world and I held her hands above her head intertwining my fingers in hers. She had her eyes closed as her breathing became more heavy and hitched, she bit her lip with holding a scream and I giggled. She opened her eyes and gave me a knowing look before she flipped our positions gaining control. Now it was my turn to hold my breath.

We continued like that for the next 20 minutes until Amy couldn't last anymore and her legs began to shake. I flipped her over and enwrapped her in my arms moving slow and steady until I felt myself about to explode. I pulled out and laid on top of her too weak to move as we both closed our eyes.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy<strong>

I woke back up and looked at the clock it was 3 a.m. Ricky had rolled to the side of me and had me cuddled in his arms. I smiled at the blissful content look on his face. That was something we both needed it had definitely been too long. I noticed a shadowy silhouette on my wall from my window my heartbeat sped up. I took a deep breath and repositioned myself in Ricky's arms my back now facing him.

I tries to focus my eyes on the figure praying it was just a tree. It was storming outside and I was waiting for another flash of lightening. I heard the thunder and new the lightening would soon follow. just as it did I screamed at the man in all black lingering outside.

**Okay I hope you guys liked it. It came out completely different than I imagined yesterday because I originally was going to keep them apart until next chapter but I missed them united lol;)**


	12. Anniversary

****All things Secret Life are the property of the great Brenda Hampton. She will remain The Great Brenda Hampton until or unless she messes up the AWESOMENESS that is Ramy then she'll be renamed as suited lol. Anywho enjoy;). P.S. I did this chapter in 3****rd**** P.O.V by accident and was to lazy to fix it lol sorry.**

**Chapter 12: Anniversary**

Amy yelped at the sight at the window causing Ricky to stir.

"What's going on?" he asked concerned looking at the fright in his fiancée's eyes.

"There's something outside the window." she whispered pulling the cover over her half clothed body.

Ricky glanced at the curtained window and looked out into the storm then back to Amy who was following his glaze.

"Are you sure?" he asked hazily.

"Yes it was a man in all black!." she said hysterically beginning to cry again.

"Okay, okay calm down I'll get up and go look will that make you feel better?" he said rubbing her back then easing off the bed.

She inched towards the middle of the bed the blanket still clutched tightly into her chest.

"Do you see anything?" she asked impatiently.

"Shh" he said still observing the front yard trying to see through the darkness.

Amy bit her lip the suspense was killing her and she wanted Ricky back in bed with her, like right now.

"I don't see anything Ames." he said after several minutes of silence.

He headed back towards the bed when a burst of thunder fell through the house causing Amy to squeal once more.

"Ames you're gonna wake the whole house." Ricky chuckled at his nervous girlfriend.

"Just hurry up in get back in here." she demanded pointing to the bed.

Ricky's eyes gleamed at her assertiveness "yes ma'am."

Amy blushed in embarrassment at her sudden burst of authority.

Ricky gave her a seductive smile drifting in close to Amy. With just inches separating them he graced her trembling lips with a comfortable kiss.

She smiled slightly then frowned. "Ricky I'm so scared. I try to pretend everything's fine but I'm afraid everyday. I'm so happy that you're here with me now."

"Hey, hey its fine." he soothed. "I know you're afraid, but I'll always be her with you Ames." he smiled warmly planting a kiss to her temple. "Now and forever remember."

Amy looked up at him and smiled. "Now and forever."

Her eyes became heavy leading her to yawn, finally able to sleep peacefully in the arms of her angel. Ricky grazed his fingers through her hair adoring the strong woman that lie next to him slowly following suit.

* * *

><p>"It's so great to be home." Amy exhaled dropping her bags by the apartment door.<p>

Ricky gave her a look and she retrieved her discarded bags and headed to the bedroom.

"Thanks Amy" Ricky smiled accomplished.

"Yea, yea." Amy replied rolling her eyes. As much as she loved Ricky he was borderline psycho when it came to cleaning. He would give Danny Tanner a run for his money she was sure of it.

"Daddy! Daddy!" John came running excitedly hugging Ricky's leg.

"What's up buddy." He said bending down to John's height.

"I wanna show you what I did." he exclaimed with a big smile. "Come on"

"Uh oh" Ricky thought as his son drug him towards the bathroom where Amy stood.

"Did you play in the waterfall again buddy" Ricky whined as Amy laughed.

"No silly" Amy interjected lacing her fingers with Ricky's.

"Look!" John ordered pointing to his training potty.

"Ugh someone made a stinky." Ricky murmured holding his nose.

Then it hit him. "Oh my God! John you used the potty!" he shouted happily twirling his son in the air.

Amy and John giggled wildly; Amy amused at Ricky's reaction and John enjoying being twirled by his poppa.

"Yep our baby is a big boy now." Amy rendered sadly.

"Kind of bittersweet huh?" Ricky asked holding John still in his arms.

"Yea." she said melancholy. "He's growing up so fast."

"Well, you know what we could do to ease the pain." Ricky smirked. Letting John run off to play.

"Oh no don't even try it Mr. 5-year plan" Amy retorted quickly.

"Well I propose a compromise my queen." He sang bowing to Amy.

Amy laughed "Alright my king I shall hear your idea." she curtsied.

"How about I revise my 5-year plan and you think about changing your motion on baby number 2."

"I thought John was the only kid you wanted and you wanted to be fixed." She smiled crossing her arms.

"Well I was running scared then and things change." he shrugged.

"Mmhmm well when I go back for my check up we'll see how everything's healed." she pointed to her wound.

Ricky nodded and went to nibbling on her neck. Amy giggled enjoying the attention running her hands up and down Ricky's side creeping under his shirt.

"Now Richard I don't suggest you starting something that we know we can't finish." Amy warned nipping at his ear.

Ricky beamed at the moist breath entering his ear and went for her lips.

"Ahem" a little voice said tugging on there pants leg.

They broke apart and smiled at their son. "Yes John?" Amy asked.

"I gotta go potty again. Out!" he said pointing to the door.

"He gets that demanding gene from you." Ricky mumbled as they exited the bathroom.

"He does, does he. Well I demand you to get in there and cook your queen some dinner." Amy ordered.

He looked at her for a minute. "You know, you're cute when you take charge like this." he smirked walking to the kitchen as Amy glared at him.

* * *

><p>John was going potty left and right all day as Amy and Ricky clapped at each success. When dinner was ready they all took their seats at the small table and started small talk. Ricky asked Amy about the nursery and did she feel comfortable with going back to work there. Amy asked Ricky how everything at the butcher shop was going, which he replied with the usual and they laughed. Everything was seemingly going back to normal and they ate chicken parmesan and shared their goals for the school year.<p>

"I hope I can be valedictorian like you." Amy smiled.

Ricky blushed at the thought of graduation. "You graduating is an accomplishment in itself."

"Yea but I still want to make you proud." She pouted.

"I'm always proud of you Amy you know that." he assured .

"That was a great day huh?" she sighed.

"One of the best ones in my life." he returned.

After dinner Amy started the dishes while Ricky got John ready for bed.

"Did you put him in the diaper or pull up?" Amy asked as Ricky came back into the kitchen.

"The diaper in case he has an accident. I didn't think the pull up would be absorbent enough."

Amy nodded as she passed Ricky a dish to dry.

"What's on your mind Ames?" Ricky questioned noticing the far away look in Amy's eyes.

She exhaled heavily and turned to face him. "I don't know" she admitted. "Things are going so great and I'm just waiting for the other shoe to fall."

Ricky sat the dish down he was drying and held onto Amy's shoulder. "We just have to take things one day at a time. Sure things were great today but tomorrow they may not seem as great. We got to start living in the moment and enjoy our time together and our happiness. We're not cats Amy we don't have 9 lives, so I say we live the one we have to the fullest."

"I guess you're right" she leaned into his chest. "No scratch that I _know_ you're right. It still amazes me how you can be such a realist and optimist at the same time." she stated resuming there formation. "After all the heartache you've endured you still stand strong keeping everything together."

"That's because I've had years and years of therapy" he chuckled. "Plus we all have to believe in something and I believe in us."

Amy smiled and they finished the dishes and got snuggled into there sofa bed in a spooning position.

"I can't believe I actually missed this little sofa bed." Amy laughed.

Ricky rubbed his nose in her neck and smiled. "It wasn't the same without you in it."

They laid in comfortable silence until Ricky had an epiphany.

"You know what Amy." he whispered as Amy rolled to face him.

"We never got to embark on our trip up the coast." he finished.

"Yea, an unfortunate event would do that to you." Amy smiled sadly thinking back to that day.

Ricky nodded. "But I really wanted us to go there, and everything I said then applies now. I just want to spend some time alone with you Amy." his brown eyes enticing hers vigorously.

Amy popped up excitedly "So what are you saying?" she asked anxiously.

"I mean, our anniversary was a few weeks ago and we weren't able to celebrate it as we should've been able too; and with school starting back in 2 weeks we'll be really busy. I want us to go away for a few days like we planned to then. Just me and you away from all the chaos just relishing in each others company." his eyes never leaving hers as he grasped her hands.

Amy smiled as the tears welled up in her eyes. She leaned in gave Ricky a soul shaking kiss that left him breathless and yearning for more.

"I'd love that." she grinned wrapping her arms around his neck resuming the passionate kiss.

Ricky closed the space between them feeding his hunger. That night they let go of the stress and troubles of tomorrow; and spent every moment in everlasting bliss.

**I made it fluffy you guys but don't get to comfy something has to stir the pot hehehe(evil laugh). Next chapter will probably be in AMY/RICKY POV but i'm just going with the flow. Hope you enjoyed it.**


	13. Holiday Inn

**** All characters belong to Brenda Hampton I own nothing, but this tale. Thanks so much for the positive reviews ;)***

**Chapter 13: Holiday Inn**

**Ricky's Dream**

"_Huh?" I thought as I looked at my surroundings. I was back at the hospital in the hallway and I wasn't alone. I ducked in one of the doorways of a vacant room, and watched the scene playing out in front of me._

_John tripped so I bent over to tie his shoe. Sounds normal right? But it wasn't me, it was the me of that time. I was watching myself do the actions I performed a few weeks ago like I was in some sort of weird Twilight Zone._

_Just as the other me got done tying the knot someone bumped into me. A strange figure that gave me a chill._

_"Sorry" the figure murmured moving quickly away from the other me and out the door. _

_He had on an all black hoodie and baseball cap. I remember I thought it was odd since it was 95 degrees out that day. I contemplated following the figure, but looked on at myself instead._

_"That's weird" I heard myself telling John walking into what I assumed was Amy's room._

_I removed myself from my hiding place and followed them till I got to Amy's door and posted myself there. I waited a minute then peaked inside I had sat John on the bed and was observing some flowers._

"_The note" I thought to myself._

_I then saw my face scrunch up in a mixture of anger and confusion as Amy woke up._

"_Ricky, what's that?" Amy asked the other me sitting up. She looked so beautiful I thought even in her darkest time she still outshined any super model in my book._

"_Focus" I told myself I'm dreaming back to this for a reason._

"_Oh its nothing." I heard myself tell her nonchalantly. I was such a jerk at that time it was hard looking back at these moments because I was hurting her and myself and we could never get those precious moments back._

_Then everything went black and I flashed to another point in my past._

_I was outside my apartment obviously after making some runs and picking up my 9mm hand gun. I watched myself walk in and drop my keys._

"_A-Ashley what are you doing here?" The other me asked; then bam I flashed to another point._

_I was talking to Adrian at Amy's homecoming party. The conversation this time was muffled, but I remember every word I said to Adrian that night. As if on cue everything went black and I flashed somewhere else._

_This time me and Amy were in her bed at her parents house. It was after we had made love because I had on my happy face. Amy was watching me sleep smiling at me, gently rubbing my cheek. I didn't know she still watched me sleep, I remember the first time I had caught her watching me it was the night of John's 1__st__ birthday. I'm actually a light sleeper I just pretend to sleep when I don't want to get up or move. I had cracked my eye open a little bit and seen her, then the air roared on and scared her and she ran back in my room before I woke up and caught her. Little did she know I saw her the whole time; that was when I knew my love for her wasn't a lost cause because she loved me too._

**Amy**

I woke up sprawled aimlessly across Ricky's bare chest. I smiled to myself remembering the events of last night. In the words of Adrian it was crazy, crazy good I don't even remember falling asleep. I moved slowly until my head was the only thing gracing the rock hard body that only Ricky could have he fidgeted a little but not because of my touch. It seemed as if he was having a very intense dream because his face was serious and his eyebrow was furrowed.

_**Ricky's Dream cont..**_

"_Ahhh" I heard Amy scream and the other me jumped up._

"_What's going on?" the other me asked barely awake._

"_There's something outside the window." she said hysterically._

"_Are you sure?" I heard the crankiness in my voice._

"_Yes it was a man in all black!" she cried._

_A man with all black? Like at the hospital my voice trailed off as I was waking up._

**Amy**

My hands drifted across his chest and torso rubbing the old scars and marks of his body. They say every scar has a story; and as I grazed each one of his I knew he didn't have a good one to share.

"Morning." Ricky yawned squeezing me close.

"Do you think old scars ever heal? Like really heal." I asked still studying the marks.

He mulled over my question and let out a deep sigh. "I think on the outside they will but on the inside they'll always be there. Emotionally."

I nodded and kissed the corner of his lips before returning to his shoulder. He began stroking my hair as we waited for John to wake up. I snuggled into his neck when something else caught my eye.

"Seems like your little soldier is at attention." I smirked at him.

He raised an eyebrow in confusion before catching my drift and blushing. I'd been feeling good the last couple of days after our "seize the day" talk so I thought I'd be spontaneous. I sat up and gave him a sinful gaze and bit my lip.

"Uh oh what's going on in the pretty little head of yours." he smiled.

"I can show you better than I could tell you." I gleamed and went down to work.

* * *

><p><strong>Ricky<strong>

Amy and I laid in each others arms for a couple hours after we got done fooling around. I was thinking about that crazy dream I had when John came out. He was carrying his wet diaper in his hand exposing himself with a sad face.

"What's the matter buddy?" I said going over to him.

"I had an oopsy" he bawled in to my arms.

"Aw its okay buddy, these things happen sometimes even to the best of us." I smiled trying to cheer him up.

"Even you daddy." he questioned.

I looked back at Amy who was beaming at the whole conversation then back at my embarrassed son.

"Yep even daddy, now lets go get you cleaned up." I said grabbing his hand.

* * *

><p>After I got John ready Amy hopped in the shower after popping us in some breakfast tv dinners.<p>

"Okay bud do you want the French toast sticks or waffles?" I asked pointing to each.

"French Toast!" he exclaimed clapping his hands.

"Alright French toast at your service" I said dropping the tray in front of him.

"Okay Ricky you go hop in real quick then we can drop John off and hit the road." Amy said drying her hair with a towel.

"Okey dokey" I said taking one last bite of my waffle and kissing Amy on the forehead as I passed.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy<strong>

After getting the 3rd degree from parents about where we going, how long we were staying for, and giving them the number to the hotel we were finally off on our road trip up the coast.

"This is so exciting!" I screamed opening up the sunroof on my SUV so I could feel the wind in my hair.

"Yea it is Amy." Ricky chuckled at me as I let my seat back in put my bare feet on the dashboard.

"Gosh I just feel so free right now its crazy! I just can't explain it." I laughed.

"You're so country, now your foot prints are gonna be on the window." he laughed.

"Oh come on Ricky its time to let loose. Who's being uptight now." I mocked.

"Well I have to drive therefore I will not be letting loose." he stated.

"Oh really?" I asked leaning over trailing kisses from his neck to his ear.

The car started speeding up so I knew I had him right where I wanted.

"Okay Amy you win unless you want me to ram into this car in front of us." he breathed.

"No, no I want to live to see this whole trip." I giggled relenting back to my stance.

* * *

><p><strong>Ricky<strong>

We were going on our 3rd hour of driving and Amy was getting restless. She had slept the last hour and a half and now she was up singing show tunes.

"Now I see why you play the French horn." I commented.

"And what is that suppose to mean?" she batted her eyelashes.

"It means that I wouldn't even recommend you singing a lullaby." I said amused.

She rolled her eyes and hit me playfully on the arm continuing her dreadful version of _Grease 2's _"Cool Rider." I laughed as she tossed her hair to and fro singing into her make believe microphone; playing an air guitar and beating invisible drums. I seen a sign for a rest stop in the next couple of miles and changed into the last right lane. I thought since we were halfway there this would be a good place to stop and stretch our legs.

"I'm gonna stop at this gas station so we could fuel up and you could get a snack or something." I informed Amy.

She nodded her head and continued to look out the window at the California hills humming. As we pulled in the place looked pretty deserted, I told Amy to hurry. The place gave me the creeps like a live version of _House of Wax_. As I was pumping the gas I changed to the weather station to hear what the forecast was looking like; probably something I should have done before we left, but I don't do "should've." Just as I suspected a storm was heading towards our destination set to hit midnight tomorrow. This whole trip was giving me a bad vibe since that ridiculous dream and I really just wanted to turn around. I seen Amy hop back in the car with a smile and I knew I couldn't she was too excited. She wanted this even needed this so the show would go on hopefully I wouldn't regret this.

* * *

><p>"How far now?" Amy moaned shifting uncomfortably in her seat.<p>

"About 20 more mins patience my dear patience." I said rubbing her leg.

She pouted. "My butt hurts."

"I'm sorry." I laughed.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy<strong>

I jumped for joy as we pulled up to the beach front Holiday Inn of Santa Monica.

"Ricky its so beautiful here." I gushed as he grabbed our bags.

"Its decent." he said modestly.

"No its perfect and I love it." I said grabbing a bag.

We checked in at the front desk and made our way to the elevator heading to the 7th floor.

"You know 7 is the luckiest number." I eyed Ricky.

"Well I guess we're in for a lucky trip. I have so much planned for us."

He gave me a devious look and I knew I was in trouble.

"Well I can't wait to have 3 whole days, with you, without interruption." I said cornering him in the elevator.

We viciously attacked each others lips dropping all our luggage. We anxiously yanked at one another's clothes like it was in our way.

"I want you so bad right now Amy." Ricky whispered seductively in my ear taking my lobe in his mouth.

"Mmm" I moaned into his neck "than take me Mr. Underwood." I hissed.

He gave me that smirk and picked me up sucking on every inch of my upper body. Just as we were about to hit 3rd base the doors opened and we quickly tried straightening our clothes.

Some old couple looked unto us in horror as I tucked in Ricky's shirt. We grabbed our things and rushed out like nothing happened, which was pointless because Ricky had a trail of lip-gloss going down his face and I was flushed red.

"Well that was embarrassing." I huffed out of breath.

"But it was wild." Ricky smiled leading us into our room.

The room was so beautiful, there was a little sitting room when you first came in with a couch and coffee table. To the left there was a bathroom with a glass shower and his and her sinks; it was equipped with necessary toiletries and everything. There was a wet bar by the flat screen tv and a king sized bed. I know this is ridiculous but the bed is what I got the most excited for. I've never been on a king sized bed, and my first experience on one would be with Ricky. I laughed at the thought because a lot of my first experiences were with Ricky, must be fate.

I jumped on the bed gazing out at the beach scenery it was such a beautiful night. It was a full moon over the cascading waves on the pacific and I hadn't seen anything like it.

**Ricky**

"Its beautiful isn't it." Amy said jumping in my arms.

"Eh, I've seen better." I shrugged.

"And what's more beautiful than a full moon?" she asked still in my arms.

"You." I mouthed kissing her gently on the lips and letting her down.

"I'm gonna go take a shower, and then we can go for a walk on the beach." I said getting my bag.

"it's a date." she winked and jumped back on the bed searching the channels.

I smiled and shook my head. How could one person be so amazing.

I walked into the bathroom and stretched. I started the shower and took out my axe, I wasn't one for using hotel products. Just as I was about to get in my phone rang, my hands were already wet so I just let it go to voicemail. Whatever it was couldn't be that important?

**Okay this was just a filler the story is almost coming to an end, and some people aren't going down without a fight. Its time for the final show down who will survive?**


	14. Sandcastle Disco

****All characters of Secret Life belong to Brenda Hampton & Co. I'm really sad that this story is coming to an end soon;( its my first born lol. Anywho I'm trying to end it with a bang enjoy.***

**Chapter 14: Sandcastle Disco**

**Ricky**

Amy and I flooded the hotel hallways with laughter as we ran like little kids. We were soaking wet and racing to see who could get back to the suite first. Of course I was winning until she took a giant leap of faith and jumped on my back causing us both to hit the ground. She burst into another fit of laughter as she lie on top of me with my face in the ground. I got into a push up position and pumped 5 quick ones to show off, and she giggled before I slid her light body under me.

"You cheated." I huffed out of breath wagging my finger in front of her face.

She giggled and ran her hand down my jaw line. "Ladies are supposed to be first, what happened to my head start." she continued tracing my lips.

I sighed in ecstasy and pulled us both up.

"I don't think the hallway is a place to settle this." I said seductively as she smiled.

We walked the rest of the way to our room hand in hand stealing pecks at each other. I'd try to trap her lips and she'd turn leaving me with a cheek. She'd try to catch my lips, but ended up with my chin. We continued until we got to the door.

"I had a wonderful time." she sang into my ear.

"Sorry about getting you wet" I pouted.

She blushed at my statement and laced our fingers. I smirked catching the vulgarity in my words.

"I mean about us not moving up enough on the beach. I didn't know the waves would reach us." I chuckled.

Her cheeks were still 10 shades of a fiery red as she swung her hands to and fro. She finally was able to roll out an "I know."

I kissed her hands and got a couple towels out the bathroom so we could dry off. I usually took a minimum of 3 showers a day, but our late night stroll on the beach really tired me out. Now I knew where John got all his momentum from. Amy was the equivalent to the energizer bunny cuteness and all.

"You coming to bed?" Amy peeked out from under the covers getting warm.

"Yea just a minute." I whispered loudly sliding on some dry boxers and a t-shirt.

I reeled into the bed and engrossed her in my arms relishing her body heat. She let out a light yawn as she snuggled into my neck.

"Oh someone's finally all tuckered out." I snickered softly.

"Mmhmm" she moaned sleepily rubbing up and down my torso.

After she dozed off I thought about all the plans I had for us tomorrow before the storm would touch down. We made it just in time for the Holiday Inn's annual Sandcastle Disco. It was a little dance thing where all the residents could go out and have fun. There would be a couple live bands playing and I knew Amy would love it. Especially because she loved dancing and we both enjoyed music.

* * *

><p><strong>Amy<strong>

I woke up the next morning feeling empty and reached over in hopes of feeling Ricky, but felt nothing. My eyes flashed open and I popped up in a panic scanning the room.

"Ricky?" I called out hesitantly to no answer.

_Calm down Amy, calm down_. I thought to myself as I eased out of the bed.

I rummaged through some of the drawers looking for anything that would cause an intruder pain. Finally I came across a flashlight and held tightly in my hands ready to swing if need be. I went over to the couch and huddled beside it preparing for the worst. Paranoia and fear took over my body instantly. That's when I realized I wasn't as okay as I thought I was. Being held hostage really did do a number on me, just then the door swung open. I closed my eyes as the person struggled to get in. I peaked open one eye and saw was black I pounced and attacked the person with my flashlight.

"Ow, Amy what the hell?" I heard the voice say and was immediately embarrassed.

"Oh God, Ricky I'm sorry I wasn't sure if it was you." I rushed out now noticing the black thing was a dress bag.

"So you thought hit now ask questions later." he huffed "Who else could it be with a key." he dangled the key and rubbed his hurt shoulder.

"I said I was sorry" I shrugged. "You know what they say better safe than sorry."

He rolled his eyes and sat the bag down on the bed glaring at me.

"You could have woke me and told me you were going out so technically this is your fault, I'm fragile." I giggled trying to make light out of the situation.

"I wrote you a note." he replied hastily pointing to the bathroom door where a sticky note laid.

"Oh" I said bashful at my own ignorance. "Well anyone could have missed that. You know I hate those stupid things." I said annoyed.

That was Ricky's thing. He left sticky notes everywhere in the house for everything. I never got why he couldn't just text me, or call, or here's an idea just wake me up. All he would do is laugh and continue to do it.

"Hey, you're the one whose cranky in the morning. I wasn't gonna unleash the beast." he laughed.

I rolled my eyes and turned my attention on the black dress bag on the bed. A smile instantly graced my lips.

"So what's in the bag wonderful man of mine." I hummed clasping my hands.

"Hmm, just a little something I picked up for my little power ranger." he teased.

I giggled and gestured to the bag getting permission to open it. He simply nodded and smiled. I ran the zipper down slowly so I could take in every inch of this moment. Once I got it down my mouth gaped open.

"Ricky…" I choked out on the verge of tears.

"Do you like it?" he asked nervously.

"I love it! Its so perfect." I wrapped my arms around his neck as a tear sank out. He embraced me happily squeezing me close.

After swaying in our loving embrace I turned back and picked up the white dress. It was a sleeveless dress that reached the middle of my thigh. Form fitting around the breast area, and hung light and flowy the rest of the way. It was beautiful but I didn't understand why he got it for me.

"Ricky what's the occasion I know this dress had to be expensive." I bit my lip.

He smiled. "it's a surprise and money isn't a problem when it comes to you Amy. You deserve all that money could buy and more."

He bent over and gently kissed my lips igniting a fire within me.

"How did I get so lucky?" I said caressing my lips.

"I ask myself that everyday." he countered linking our lips again.

* * *

><p>"Almost!" I called out to an impatient Ricky.<p>

I was taking forever to get ready, but I wanted to make sure my hair and make up was as flawless as this dress. It hugged every inch of my body perfectly and it amazed me that he knew just what size to get. I slipped on my champagne dollhouse heels and took one last twirl before opening the door.

**Ricky**

"Wow! Amy you look…wow" I knew my mouth was probably wide open and I struggled to close it.

"Wow yourself." she said equally stunned. I don't know why. I went simple, a black button down and khakis, oh and of course my black boots. Tonight was her night so I wanted her to shine.

"Shall we go." I smiled holding out my arm.

"We shall." she sang back.

I took Amy too a secluded part of the beach and set up a little picnic before the festivities started.

"This is so beautiful. I never pegged you as a romantic." she winked.

"That's because I have a lot of layers and you're the only one who's been able to peel them." I whispered coming up behind her wrapping her in my arms.

We stood like that at the edge of the little cliff watching the waves cascade.

"I guess we should eat." she smiled leading me back to the blanket.

"I guess we should."

* * *

><p>"Are you ready for the next part?" I exclaimed excitedly.<p>

"There's more?" she laughed.

"Yep follow me." I nodded.

When we got back towards the hotel Amy noticed the Sandcastle Disco sign.

"Ricky you didn't!" she said giddy squeezing my hand.

"I thought maybe you'd like to dance under the stars." I replied nonchalantly.

"Oh my gosh Ricky I love you so much" she yanked me in a hug.

"Love you too." I chuckled. "Come on its about to start." I lead us to an empty spot and embraced her.

She laid her head on my shoulder as I dropped mine to her waist getting lost in the beat. We swayed slowly melting into each others body in a sensual trance. I tried to keep in my mind we were surrounding by people because this could easily turn sexual. Unfortunately, they faded away from my mind and all I could see was Amy.

**Amy**

I rubbed my fingers up and down Ricky's back I couldn't believe something was actually going as planned. I moved my arms to the neck of my love and whispered.

"You're not the only one with a surprise."

"Is that right." he raised an eyebrow. I just nodded.

"Meet me in the room in 15 mins." and with that I disappeared into the crowd.

I ran up to the room and almost busted the door down. I knew my little trip a couple weeks ago to Vicky's Secret would pay off. I started the shower and let the lukewarm water cool down my hot body. I wanted my hair to get wet so it could be wavy, because Ricky expressed he liked it that way. As soon as I got everything positioned in my ensemble I heard the door open and close. I giggled to myself at how impatient Ricky was.

"I still have 5 mins!" I laughed opening the bathroom door.

The glass I was holding slipped out of my hand and dropped to the floor. My mouth opened and a silent scream escaped as the glass shattered.

"No…"

* * *

><p><strong>Ricky<strong>

Since Amy wanted a little time I called back home and chatted with John. He was so happy to talk to me, I felt bad for not bringing him along.

"Me and Robie played in the pool daddy." he giggled.

"Did you have funny buddy." I smiled.

"Yes lots! Where's momma?" he questioned.

"She went to the room buddy. I'm gonna go check on her I just wanted to say goodnight." I explained.

"Goodnight daddy!"

"Night John I love you."

"Love you too!" he sprang out and he must of shut the phone, because the line went dead.

I sighed, as much as I loved being here I couldn't wait to get home to my son. I stood idly for a few more minutes until I felt it was okay to go up.

When I got to the room something seemed off. The door was slightly ajar and I thought I heard heavy breathing. I tip-toed lightly trying to make as little noise as possible than I heard a crunch as I was passing the bathroom. I had stepped on some broken glass.

"What the hell?" I mumbled. I could still smell Amy's perfume in the air and went towards the bed. No Amy but I did find a sticky note stuck to the lamp on the side table.

I laughed because she hates sticky notes, but she used one.

_Meet me on the roof -Amy_

She must have knew her 15 mins were almost up because the note looked rushed. I shrugged and went to the elevator and pushed the red "R."

The first thing that hit me as I opened the metal door to the roof was the breeze. It had gotten really chilly which told me that the storm was coming. I looked at the sky it was fuzzy yet beautifully colored with purple and blue hues dancing about it.

"Amy!" I called into the darkness to no reply.

I moved away from the door and started walking around. My phone buzzed in my back pocket and I figured it was her. Maybe she saw how cold it got and wanted to just go back to the room. I glanced at the screen disappointed it was that pesky voicemail reminder. I sighed and dialed in my new code, not because Amy knew the old one, or I thought she would listen to them again I just needed a change. As I dialed 329 the automated voice told me I had 6 new messages.

**Message 1: Ricky its Adrian, call me its important.**

_Adrian _are you kidding me. I thought feeling myself getting annoyed.

I continued my tenure of the roof and listened to messages, 2 and 3 which were the same as 1. Message 4 was a bill collector. As I reached the other side of the roof message 5 played it was from school.

**Message 6: Ricky I'm not trying to sleep with you jackass! Someone posted Bob's bail and he's out. Ricky my dad's out of town and he told me to call you because.."**

After I heard Bob and bail I dropped the phone, I had found her. At the sight of Amy my breath hitched and my mouth went dry. She was standing motionless barely dressed in some type of lingerie that would normally have me excited. But seeing as my father had her tightly gripped with a gun to her head I froze.

"Nice of you to finally join us, Richard?" he sneered.

I still stood frozen, mentally kicking myself for leaving my gun in the glove compartment of the car.

"What? cat got your tongue! Talk you little bastard." he screamed yanking Amy as more tears poured down her eyes.

"Let her go!" I hesitated "Please" I begged.

He laughed as I pleaded for him to let Amy go and to take me instead.

"Did you like the flowers I had sent to you?" he whispered in Amy's ear. Gripping her hair tightly she winced.

"You didn't send that it wasn't even your handwriting!" I argued moving closer, but stopped as he raised the gun back.

"Ricky I've been to jail many times mostly because of you. Did you really think it was over? I promised to destroy you and everything you love. You know how easy it was to break into your apartment and send flowers from a floral company to her room? All I had to do was tell them what to write." he spat.

Ricky thought back to the day Ashley had popped up inside his apartment. That's probably how she'd gotten in because Bob had came in before her.

"How long have you been out?" I choked out.

"Long enough to come up with this genius plan." he grimaced.

"What's the plan?" I asked inching forward.

"Well since you must know, and you're dying soon anyway." he laughed. "I realized my mistakes with you and Nora and I wanted to fix them. So since Amy's basically Nora's doppelganger I figured God had sent me a second chance."

"Ricky he's crazy!" Amy cried.

"Shut up!" he hissed moving his arm from her hip to around her neck. "I'm not finished."

"Don't hurt her!" I yelled as he continued.

"Anyway me and Amy along with John are fleeing the state and living happily ever after." he croaked. "I'm going to make things right."

"What?" I huffed in confusion running my fingers thru my hair yanking a bit.

"You heard right. I'm starting over I'm a new man. All I have to do is tie up a loose end." he claimed.

"And what's that?" I asked sarcastically.

"You!" he screamed as he slammed Amy against the brick wall and launched at me.

He punched me in the face with the gun knocking me down. I felt the blood trickle out of my busted lip and jumped up. I punched him in the face knocking him back a few steps and knocked the gun out of his hand. He grabbed me by the neck and slammed me on the pavement. He tried to run towards the gun, but I caught his leg and he fell to his face. I crawled over his body stretching for the gun, but he pushed me off. At this point both of us were tired, hurt, and out of breath furiously crawling towards the 34 caliber pistol. We ended up in yet another brawl trying to take the others hand off the gun.

**Amy**

I opened my eyes slowly and held my head. Bob had threw me against the wall like a rag doll; and I felt the blood gushing out of my head and nose. I looked up and focused my eyes on the fight before me, it was like deja vu watching them battle for the gun. I tried to get up, but everything got fuzzy and I fell back down.

"Amy stay down!" I heard Ricky yell at me.

It looked like Ricky had it until Bob flipped him to his back and then my worst fear happened. The gun went off.

"Ricky!" I shrieked crawling over to where the two men lay not moving.

As I got closer Ricky pushed Bob's lifeless body off of him and scooted towards the wall.

"Ricky oh my God are you okay?" I cried as he sat shell shocked staring at Bob.

"Its okay he's dead" I tried to comfort him. A bolt of lightening shot though the sky and rain began to pour heavily over the scene.

I huddled into Ricky whose face was drained white. I knew for sure he was in shock, but we needed to call the police. I got up to retrieve his discarded phone but he grabbed my arm pulling me back into him.

"I thought I was dead." he mumbled softly into my hair. I could barely hear him.

"Its gonna be okay." I sniffled placing a kiss on his lips. "I'm going to get your phone to call the police and I'm coming right back to you. Don't move." I assured.

I don't why I said don't move I knew he wasn't. He couldn't even look me in my eyes he was so spaced out and scared. It didn't take long for the paramedics and officers to arrive. I accepted the blanket the officer gave me and tightly pulled it around my body. I would have been embarrassed at my attire, but my emotions were all over the place, and I was just worried about Ricky. He didn't look so good. As I was giving my statement I looked over to where Ricky still sat unable to move as another officer tried their best to get his statement.

After a couple hours we were released back to our rooms and it felt like the longest walk in my life. Ricky was so distant and silent. I wanted to say something, but couldn't find the right words. His hand was trembling and I reached to grab it, but he shrugged me away leaving me hurt. When we got into the room he went and sat by the window still lost in his thoughts.

"Ricky" I trailed off. He ignored me and continued to stare outside.

I walked into the bathroom slamming the door behind me. I sat against it with my head in my hands and cried. I wasn't mad at him or maybe I was I don't know my mind was so scrambled and I needed him to be my rock. I needed him to be the strong Ricky he always was.

I laughed sadly to myself at the selfishness of my statement. I needed to get it together I didn't know what was going on with him or what he must be feeling. I just knew I had to be strong for him he was the one broken this time. It was my job to be his rock, and I would. But tonight, tonight I would sit here and cry and figure out how this day ended so wrong.

**Hmm. That was intense, I know everyone's probably glad Bob's finally out of the picture, but at what cost? What's going on with Ricky? Whelp! Next chapter we'll get to see what he's feeling when he visits good ole Dr. Fields. We got 2 more chapters plus the Epilogue so anything can happen. Thanks for reading hope you liked it;)**


	15. Resentment

****All characters of Secret Life belong to Brenda freaking Hampton! I own nothing but the plot. Chapter is in 3****rd**** person POV.***

**Chapter15: Resentment**

Amy sighed as she trudged up the stairs leisurely making the trip last as long as possible. As she got to the midpoint the faint sounds of cymbals became more prevalent with the beat. Ricky was playing his drums…again. Its been a constant routine for the past 6 weeks since the _accident_ happened; and she was starting to lose patience with him. Amy rolled her eyes as she adjusted a sleeping John in her arms, praying the loud beat of the drums wouldn't wake him.

She opened the door and Ricky immediately stopped playing, and went over to the couch. He didn't even look at her, and hadn't looked at her for the past couple of months. He would give the occasional glance when he thought she wasn't looking, but nothing more. That was part of the reason she started dreading coming home.

Ricky let out a deep sigh of relief when Amy went into John's room to put him down. He got up in search of his keys; to escape the uncomfortable vibe in the apartment. The tension between him and Amy was so thick that when they were home at the same time it made it hard to breathe. He furrowed his eyebrow in frustration as the search continued. He wanted to get out before Amy came back. He heard a jingle behind him as he ran his fingers thru his hair baffled. He never misplaced anything.

"Looking for these?" Amy taunted shaking the keys.

Ricky closed his eyes and turned to face his fear. Her.

"Give me my keys." he ordered, jaw clenched eyes looming above her head.

"No." she replied flatly.

Ricky felt his face starting to sting in anger. This was something he did everyday, and he really didn't understand why Amy chose today to play games.

"Just give them to me." he whispered annoyed stepping closer to his fiancée.

"No!" she repeated as her lip quivered in anger.

"Ugh!" Ricky groaned in frustration. "Why are you doing this."

"Why won't you talk to me." she whined. Breaking the tough shield she was putting on.

Ricky huffed and bit his lip. This is what he'd been hoping to avoid all these weeks. Talking. To Amy specifically, he didn't want to talk to her, or see her. Not because he stopped loving her, but because when he looked at her he was back on that cold roof. He was back in a place in time that hurt and he didn't want to feel that pain.

"Amy, please just give me the keys." his eyes pleading for understanding.

Amy searched his dark shadowy eyes for answers. Only seeing the grief and agony over his action that's been torturing him the past month.

"I can't let you go." she whispered as tears coated her green eyes.

Ricky looked blankly ahead realizing that this was a battle he wasn't going to win. He was trapped. Trapped in a no win situation, he was damned if he left and damned if he didn't. He resented the fact that Amy was making him stay somewhere he didn't want to. If it was anything he hated it was the feeling of being imprisoned.

"Ricky please. You haven't said more than 3 words to me since our trip." Amy confessed moving closer to him. "I miss you."

She cupped his face in her hands and he closed his eyes. Rubbing his hot face against her soft palm. He felt a tear roll out the brim of his eye and sighed. This shocked Amy because Ricky hadn't shown any kind of emotion in almost a month in a half. She had been living in a glass house tip toeing around, trying not to throw a stone. All the while he was walking around like a robot. She bit her lip as her own tear fell and gently rubbed her thumb against his cheek.

When it seemed like she had finally got a breakthrough Ricky cleared his throat, and took a step forward closing the little gap left between them. Amy gasped at the closeness it was the one thing she'd missed over the weeks. She could feel Ricky's warm breath on her lips pulling her to them.

"What are you doing?" she exhaled and shushed her covering his lips with hers.

Amy felt herself melting into the kiss as Ricky began deepening it. Her mind knew that Ricky was only doing this to distract not only her from the problem, but himself as well. He didn't want to talk and he'd do anything to not have to; even using her vulnerability to him against her. He engulfed her in his arms and moved his hands under her shirt and she knew she had to stop this. It wasn't right and he wasn't in the right state of mind. He was trying to use sex to ease the pain.

"Ricky no, we have to discuss this." she hummed breaking the kiss.

She cupped his face once more seeking to make eye contact, but he shook out of her grip.

"I can't do this." he snapped reaching for the keys once more. To no avail.

Amy snatched them away too quickly, holding them behind her back. He clenched his jaw, balling his fist attempting to keep his composure. After a mini stare down he stomped off angrily into the bathroom locking the door. Amy huffed in defeat and threw the keys against the wall furiously. She ran her fingers through her hair nervously; as she came up with another angle to get to Ricky. She reached in her back pocket for her cell she had 2 calls to make.

* * *

><p>Ricky fell limply against the door as his body shook in despair. He slammed his head against the door rocking back and forth mumbling to himself as the memories replayed.<p>

*Flashback*

_The gun went off and Bob's eyes instantly became glassy as his breathing got shallow. Ricky lay trapped under Bob's weight unable to move, and forced to see the man he grew to hate die slowly in front of his eyes. He laid in bed many times praying that Bob would die, but now that the reality was happening he felt a piece of him dying too._

"_I vowed to ruin your life son." Bob choked out as his body slowly became limp._

"_I couldn't have _picked_ a better way to do it." he coughed as he still lay on top of Ricky._

"_You will have to live with the guilt of my death for the rest of your life."_

_*End of Flashback*_

* * *

><p>"Thanks mom for agreeing to watch John. Its just until Dr. Fields leaves. Ricky has been refusing sessions and I think he needs them." Amy stated sadly as her mother walked to the door with John.<p>

"Its no problem. If you want I can keep him until the morning, that way you guys can take your time." she offered.

"Yea that'd be good. This is really my last resort." she sniffled. "He's hurting so much mom and I can't reach him."

"Well Dr. Fields knows how to get Ricky to talk so if he's slipping away I'm sure he can reel him back. You stop worrying and just be there for him after he leaves. He's gonna need your support Amy." Anne smiled.

"Drive safely mom, precious cargo." she said pointing to John.

"Always." Anne smiled back before descending down the stairs.

* * *

><p>Ricky popped up from his seating position and glared at himself in the mirror. What he saw in his reflection was a monster and it scared him. What he also saw was Bob he was still haunting him. He felt hot tears of regret and guilt spill the feelings he couldn't hold any longer. They were rolling out faster than he could catch, and he felt himself breaking down. Before he knew it his still braced hand connected to the mirror shattering it to pieces.<p>

"Ricky!" the concerned voices of Amy and Dr. Fields yelled simultaneously beating on the bathroom door.

Ricky stood surveying the cut on his knuckles, watching intently as each drop of blood hit the sink. The deep red hue spreading onto the white of his arm brace.

"Ricky unlock the door. You know holding all the pain inside won't help." the therapist reasoned.

Ricky just sighed emotionless watching the blood run down his fingers. Blood that was the sight he had got accustomed to seeing a long time ago, so why was that time so different? Maybe because this time the pool of blood he was laying in was caused by an injury he inflicted. A life he took, no matter how undeserving the person who held it was. The voices started to replay in his head and he fell to his knees hitting the lock.

"Ricky!" Amy screamed as she rushed to his side. He was curled up in a fetal position holding his ears.

Dr. Fields appeared behind her shaking his head at how far gone Ricky really was. Ricky opened his now red eyes and seen the man he entrusted most staring somberly at him.

"Get her out of her." he cried referring to Amy.

The doctor nodded his head and slowly stepped in grabbing Amy by her arm. She resisted at first not wanting to leave Ricky, but she saw the sternness in his eyes and the coldness in Ricky's. She let a tear peek out and followed him into the living room out of earshot.

"Amy I know this is hard, but I've dealt with Ricky this way before. It might be a good idea for you to leave a few hours and give me some time with him alone." he suggested.

"I don't want to leave him." she sniffled.

"He's not gonna want to talk while you're here." he exclaimed honestly.

Amy sighed and wiped the tears on her flushed cheeks. "He doesn't love me anymore." she whimpered.

"Actually Amy, it's the complete opposite. He's embarrassed, he doesn't want you to see him this way. He wants for you to think of him as strong, dependable." he informed.

"I just want to be there for him like he was for me all this time." she argued.

"Trust me he knows you're helping. Especially since you called me." he smiled. "I'll call you to give you an update." he promised.

Amy nodded and grabbed her purse and keys heading towards the door.

* * *

><p>When Dr. Fields reentered the bathroom he found Ricky sitting "knees to chest" against the bathtub.<p>

"Ricky." he said softly. "Come on let's go to the living room so we can talk."

Ricky still sat unresponsively against the tub. Dr. Fields exhaled and went over to the young man and helped him up. He plopped him on the couch and took a seat on the end chair.

"Ricky you know you were sentenced to see me 3 times a week after your classes. Yet you haven't made it to one visit." he scolded in a fatherly tone.

Although they didn't press charges against him for Bob's death; the courts did order him to counseling to help him cope with the tragedy. Ricky being Ricky shelled up after the experience and didn't want to see anybody. He'd go to school, go to work, and come home. He'd find little ways to spend a little time with John at hours when Amy wasn't home, but as soon as she'd returned he'd disappear.

"What are you thinking about right now?" Dr. Fields asked the lost teen.

Ricky was silent at first, but made eye contact with the shrink. "About how I can hate a man with every fiber of my being, yet still love him." he fumed.

Dr. Fields nodding at the admission and scribbled in the hefty file.

"Ricky that's perfectly normal for abused children to still harbor love for the abuser. Especially in your case Ricky your abuser was someone you were suppose to trust, a parent someone who was supposed to protect you." he assured. "It's okay to feel hurt or mourn."

Ricky let a ray of tears well down inhaling everything that he's just been told. It didn't sound right for him to still harbor any kind of feeling towards a child molester.

"He was a sick bastard he deserved to die." Ricky said nonchalantly.

"On paper yes, but he was still your father. You had glimpses of good times although they were way overpowered by the bad. It doesn't mean you never had a sliver of hope he'd change."

Ricky remained silent as he listened to the doctor voice his thoughts. He was right he had kept a glimmer of hope that Bob would reform. Of course he never wanted to build a relationship with him, but he always wanted an apology. He wanted an apology from him for ruining his childhood, and wanted more than ever to be able to forgive him. Not to make Bob feel better, but to rid himself of the burdens he still carried.

"I just feel so guilty." Ricky groaned. "He told me I'd feel guilty for this."

"For killing him?" Dr. Fields furrowed his eyebrow.

"Yea and I feel like I should be happy about it, but I'm not." he huffed. "I feel like I'm betraying Amy by feeling remorseful. I'm ashamed that when he died I felt apart of me died too. I shouldn't feel this way about a person who caused so much pain to us."

"You're human Ricky. Its okay to feel that way and Amy will understand. She loves you. Him telling you that you'd feel this way was a last stitch effort to hurt you. Don't let him win by subconsciously destroying your family." he reassured.

"I know but when I look at her." he hesitated. "When I look at her I feel humiliated. I don't want her to see me as a killer, or a monster. I'm afraid of myself so I know she's probably scared."

"Ricky you are not a monster and you know that. Pushing her away isn't going to help. You acting as if you don't care is making her think you don't love her." he regulated.

"Sh-she thinks that?" Ricky asked hastily.

The doctor nodded. "I understand what you're doing and feeling, but she doesn't."

Ricky sighed. "I love her more than anything. I just sensed that everything would be different now. Like she may not love me the same."

* * *

><p>Amy pulled up to the butcher shop slowly shifting the gear into park. She closed her eyes in anticipation of what was to come. Dr. Fields gave her the okay to come back, but she was afraid to go up and face Ricky. John was still at her mother's she thought it'd be a good idea to keep him there. She figured he didn't need to witness another argument between the two.<p>

She got to the back staircase of the old building and strolled up. To her surprise the manic pounding of drums didn't feel the air. She fumbled nervously with her keys feeling every beat her racing heart made.

"Here goes nothing." she mumbled quietly.

She opened the door and the sweet aroma of pasta and rolls hit her. She glanced towards the kitchen and watched as Ricky sat the Lasagna on the neatly set table, illuminated by candles.

"Ricky…" she whispered in surprise at the ambiance.

He flashed her a timid smile before removing his apron. He sauntered over to where she stood frozen and removed her purse and jacket. Leading her over to the chair she always sat in and pulled it out. She reluctantly took a seat afraid to have any expectations for the night. They sat in an awkward silence not wanting to address the elephant in the room. Every once in a while they'll catch each other's eye and share nervous smiles.

"I don't know why this feels so uncomfortable." Amy smiled breaking the ice.

"I do." he sighed feeling the embarrassment reach his cheeks.

Another calm silence went over the room as they continued to play with their food.

"So much for a romantic apology dinner." Ricky said and Amy let out a giggle.

"I'm actually enjoying you being able to look at me." she rationalized.

A dark mood loomed over the room and Ricky's mouth turned into a frown. Amy noticing her choice of words instantly began to apologize but Ricky stopped her.

"Its okay, you have a right to be angry with me. I'm sorry I've been distant with you Amy I just didn't know how to express my feelings. This is my apology dinner to you so all the 'sorry's' should be coming from me."

He saw her sparkling green iris's gloss over in tears. He moved closer to her bending down on one knee, gripping each of her dainty hands with his hurt ones. His dark brown orbs roamed hers begging for forgiveness of his past behavior.

"I forgive you, Ricky." she choked out after several long minutes. "I love you too much to stay mad at you." she chuckled sadly.

"Amy I know I've been really hard to deal with, but I'm going to keep seeing Dr. Fields and he's going to help me thru this-" he started before Amy interrupted him.

She let go of his hands and moved to the couch. Ricky followed her and waited quietly for her to say what she was thinking.

"That's the problem Ricky. I want to help you thru this too." she bit her lip staring in his eyes.

Ricky sighed and inched closer to her. He gathered her face in his hands and a smile appeared on his lips. "If you would have let me finish; I was going to say I wanted you to come with me."

Amy's lips curled into a smile as she launched herself into Ricky's arms. He cuddled her tightly burying his face in the sweet scent of her hair. He missed being able to hold her like this out of fear of hurting her so he was taking in every moment. Amy nuzzled Ricky's neck with her nose squeezing him as hard as she could. She didn't want to let him go in case this was all just a dream, and when she pulled back he'd be back to avoiding her.

"I love you Ricky, I'm not afraid of you." she breathed softly in his ear.

He smiled expressing those deep dimples she loved so much even though she couldn't see them. He reluctantly loosened their hug and looked directly in her eyes.

"You are the one constant in my life Amy, that I know will never harm me or leave. I don't want to go another day without being able to call you my wife." he said with so much passion that Amy lost her breath.

"What are you saying Ricky?" she managed to squeak out.

"I'm saying to hell with that 5 year plan. I don't want to wait to marry you another day." he grinned.

Amy gasped with excitement and squeezed Ricky's hands. He whimpered in pain as she gripped his hurt hand too tightly.

"I'm sorry." she smirked kissing the battered and bruised knuckles.

Ricky gave a lust filled grin attacking her with a mind blowing kiss. They got more feverish with every peck and soon found themselves in nothing but each other.

Ricky pulled back and smiled. Finally being able to let go of the last words that Bob had engraved him with. "I love you, Amy."

**Okay 2 more updates and we're finito guys =(. Next Chapter is going to be called **_**Let's Get Married, **_**and you all know what that means RAMY WEDDING lol then the Epilogue. Thank you all so much for showing so much love to my first ever story, and I hope you guys will continue to support my efforts. Make sure to be on the look out for my next story **_**Peter and The Wolf.. **_**Ricky's gonna be a werewolf haha.**


	16. Let's Get Married

***All rights go to the respective owners of Secret Life...none of which include me unfortunately. 3****rd**** Person P.O.V I made Amy on the Catholic side and I know Ricky is Jewish, but I don't think he practices anything. Anywho I gave my own spark note version of the vows because I don't know the order they come lol forgive me and so sorry for the long sabbatical***

**Chapter 16: Let's Get Married**

Her heart was racing as she lollygagged at that backdoor of the countryside manor. She paced back and forth repeatedly, anxiously awaiting the sound that would send her outside and marching down the aisle. Her father had ran to the restroom to calm his own nerves he didn't want to rattle Amy anymore than she already was.

"Cold feet?" a voice called from behind her.

She turned coming face to face with a toothy grinned Ben. Amy returned the smile and walked into his open embrace.

"I didn't think you'd come." she announced into his shoulder.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world." he smiled rubbing circles on her back.

"I can't believe this is real." she said looking into Ben's eyes.

He observed the glistening in her emerald green eyes, noticing the questioning look in her gaze he sighed deeply. One side of his mouth twitched up in a smirk before he spoke.

"Believe it." he grasped her shoulders and stared intensely into her eyes. "That in there is your future, don't be afraid of it. After all you guys have been through this year, don't you think you deserve a happy ending?"

"What if its too soon and he's not really ready." she whispered her fear.

"Are you talking about Ricky, because we both know he doesn't do anything he doesn't want too."

She sighed. "Okay, its just that…I don't know. I wish you could have a happy ending too Ben."

The wedding chime blared through the speakers halting Ben's next words. He gave her an encouraging smile and squeezed her hand, before making his way out the front door to sneak back into the backyard.

"Ready Ames?" George appeared next to her.

She took in a deep breath and exhaled. "As I'll ever be…"

* * *

><p><strong>2 weeks earlier…<strong>

"Amy can't we just go to the justice of the peace and just bring our parents." Ricky whined as Amy began moving to the next seating chart.

"Ricky weddings are like proms you only get one, and I want this one to be perfect." she reasoned.

"You get two of those you know." he smirked.

Amy raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Proms…you get _two. _One your junior year and one your senior year; so four if you combine both of ours."

Amy rolled her eyes but smiled. "You knew what I meant."

"I just don't think we have to have such a huge wedding. It doesn't have to be so much of a big deal." he groaned.

"It _is _a big deal. Its not everyday that people like us get a happy ending. Plus we have the money for it now."

Ricky thought back to the settlement they were awarded for the police not letting them now sooner that Bob was on the loose. Most of it went to where his other savings were, and some Amy put away for just the two of them.

Ricky sighed in defeat knowing that this was one battle he wasn't going to win.

"Fine." he huffed.

"Great." she smiled eyes twinkling at her victory.

"Who did you want for your maid of honor or whatever?" Ricky asked nonchalantly while he tossed a ball to John.

"Hmm I don't know yet, I'm one the fence really." she answered honestly.

"What about Ashley?" he shrugged. In his mind it would be the obvious choice since they were sisters, although their relationship was strained. Him being one of the reasons why.

"Uh, I don't think so." she said humorously.

Ricky tossed the ball back to John and turned his attention to Amy. "Why not?"

"Do you really have to ask." she replied giving him a knowing gaze.

He nodded his head in understanding. "I'm sorry." he stated softly.

Amy sighed and went over to the couch where here fiancé sat playing catch with their son.

"As much as I want to put most of the blame on you, and the whole 'it takes two to tango' scenario; I just blame her a little bit more. She's _my _sister she should have known better, you just don't do that to your family. There are plenty other great guys out there, but she chose you. She didn't care that it would hurt me or us granted we didn't have anything at the time, but it's the principle of the matter and I just can't forgive her for that."

Ricky reached and rubbed his hand against her warm cheek not really knowing what to say. On one hand he was glad that she forgave him and didn't blame him that much, but on the other it felt wrong for her and Ashley to be at odds like this. They were family after all and he knew first hand what it felt like not have one.

"I love you, Amy and I'll regret that moment for the rest of my life and I know she'd probably take it back too."

Amy ran her fingers through her hair and blinked back a couple tears that threatened to fall.

"I better get to work on that seating chart." she pointed and went back to the table.

Ricky continued playing with John until it was his bed time.

* * *

><p>The next week Ashley popped up at the apartment. Unbeknownst to Amy, Ricky had a brief conversation with Ashley earlier letting her know about the situation. He was hoping the two of them could bury the hatchet.<p>

"Hey Ash what a surprise." Amy smiled reeling her in. "What's up?"

"Nothing I just figured maybe you needed some help with planning. Ricky told me you were stressing yourself about what music to play at the reception, and what food to serve. Thought I'd offer my excellent service." she joked trying to ease the tension.

They really hadn't spoken that much since Amy kicked Ashley out of her room a couple months ago. Aside from a few "just checking to see if you're alive" texts they're communication was nonexistent.

"I guess I could use an extra hand." she agreed.

The day went by leisurely as her and Ashley tied up every loose end left containing the wedding, and Amy said a silent thank you to herself that she had dropped John off at the daycare. She usually didn't take him on weekends, but she needed one day where she could focus. They made small talk trying to avoid the huge elephant that had been in the room the past 2 years until Ashley spoke up.

"Have you decided on a maid of honor yet?" she questioned.

"I have the bridesmaid dresses, but I haven't picked who I wanted to give the honor to yet. To be honest all the choices are sucky." she laughed.

"Madison and Lauren are questionable best friends and Grace and I have always had this unspoken competition between us. And-" she trailed off looking at Ashley.

"And I'm the sucky sister who tried to steal the groom." she finished sass intact.

Amy gave a sad smile and shrugged. "Pretty much." she whispered.

Ashley nodded her head slowly trying to feign off the hurt that was encompassing her.

"So what now, you gonna write me off like you did Adrian?" she asked with all seriousness meeting her sister's eyes.

"I don't know." Amy started after a beat. "I know I can't write you off like that because you are my sister above all things, and I do love you. I can't help the way I feel though and I don't think I can forgive you or ever understand why you did it. Did you want to hurt me?" Amy asked green eyes piercing in the chestnut ones across from her.

"Of course not Amy." Ashley uttered in disbelief. "To be honest in that moment I didn't even think about you, not until he ran off and I was left feeling guilty. I wont sit here and say I regret it, but I will say I realized it was wrong and Ricky was never mine to have. Its always been you; we all got hints of it from the beginning, but we seen it when he first held John in his arms. That's why we all tried to keep you two away."

They sat in silence until it was time to pick up John. They grabbed their respected belongings and headed for the door.

"For what its worth" Ashley began as they descended down the stairwell. "It wasn't worth it."

Amy mulled over the comment in her mind unable to find its hidden meaning. Ashley staring at her sister's bewilderment decided to elaborate further.

"The kiss. It wasn't worth all the heartbreak and drama it caused. I finally understand what dad was getting at back then." she shrugged as she got into Toby's car.

Amy wanted to tell her sister that all was forgotten and get back to there usual light hearted banter, but her feelings were still too hurt and her pride was still too strong. She watched Ashley pull out and drive away and she did the same.

* * *

><p><strong>Present day<strong>

Ricky fiddled with his tie trying to keep his eyes off the awaiting crowd. He cursed himself silently for agreeing to this big wedding, he was never one to be in the spotlight. He looked up and traded an uncomfortable smile with the Priest who was staring at him.

"What?" he whispered loudly.

"Are you okay son?" the priest asked.

"I'm fine. I'm just ready to get this over with." he confessed.

He didn't think anything could be more nerve wracking than graduation, but of course he was wrong. He peered into the audience against his better judgment and seen a bevy of smiles and waves from family and friends. Instead of making him feel relaxed it just made him more anxious. He began fingering his gray tie again that matched perfectly with his gray tux until the priest slapped his hand.

"If you pull it any tighter death will do you part sooner rather than later." he huffed.

Ricky smirked and stuck his hand in his pockets. Taking in sharp intakes of breath, but never once had he thought of running off. He smiled as he imagined how beautiful Amy was going to be walking down the aisle in her dress. He was finally making their little family official and he was finally proud of himself.

The soft music started to play through the speakers and he watched as everyone squealed and pulled out various electronics to capture the moment. Grace walked down the aisle with Jesse, Madison walked down the aisle with Ethan, and Jack walked down with Lauren to avoid any unnecessary drama. They all stood on their opposite sides of the aisle and smiled showing of the cream colored halter dresses that reached just above their knees before flaring. The guys dawned black tuxes with gray ties to coordinate with Ricky.

A smile graced his lips as he seen John walking down the aisle with the rings. He was smiling and racing towards Ricky entranced with the sparkling objects that didn't fall off the pillow. He was in a mini version of Ricky's suit. He slowed down when he noticed the little girl behind him was still tossing petals. He gave a devious grin that made Ricky shake his head.

"That's my boy." he smirked excitedly.

Then the back French doors flung open revealing the sweetest thing he's ever known. Amy walked nervously clutching her father's arm for dear life as they started their stroll. She wore a champagne colored silk dress with a split that came up just above her knee. It was an excellent choice to show off her long legs. Pearls embroidered the strapless top; while her hair was twisted in some kind of concoction that had her honey waved locks flowing down one shoulder. She could have walked down the aisle in a potato sack and Ricky would have still have found her breathtaking.

"That's my girl." he gloated to the priest.

Amy held her breath as she took steps that felt unearthed. She could have sworn she was walking on the moon. Her palms became sweaty as she watched the crowd stand and draw all their attention to her. She started wishing she would have just listened to Ricky and had a small wedding. Looking around the garden that thought quickly vanished from her mind, the layout was absolutely gorgeous. The little white chairs that went so great with the green grass, the fruit trees that cradled perfectly around the white arch that hovered over Ricky. Ricky as their eyes met she could feel the sweet release of tears, he was so handsome. She liked him in gray every since Leo's wedding and she made sure to have him in something that resembled it. As she came closer he mouthed the words "I love you" causing her cheeks to flush more.

"Amy and Ricky have decided to recite their own vows." the priest notified the crowd.

"Amy to say that I'm pleasantly surprised that we're standing here today would be an understatement. Words really can't express how much you mean to me, and I'm so honored that you have agreed to be my wife. Everyday with you and our son are the happiest days of my life. We wasted so much time fighting ourselves even depriving ourselves of what could be; and from the this day forward I don't want to do that anymore. No more fear just love." he stated kissing her hand.

Amy wiped a stray tear. "Ricky, I would have never thought that we would be so in love right now. The love we share is everlasting and I cant picture my life without you. I've never felt this way about anyone you're my first, my last, my everything, and I can't wait to grow old with you. I don't want to be afraid anymore and with you by my side I don't have to be."

As the nuptials proceeded Amy became a little uneasy. Something just didn't feel right, something didn't feel complete. So by the time the priest got to the infamous "does anyone have any objection as to why this couple shouldn't be married…" Amy felt like she was going stir crazy. While everyone's eyes went to Adrian who gave a look of total embarrassment and offend, Amy cleared her throat.

"What's wrong?" Ricky asked concerned hurt in his eyes.

Amy cupped his face in her palms. "Nothing, nothing at all I just have to right a wrong."

She cleared her throat again. "Before we finish I just want my sister to please come up here."

Everyone looked at each other wildly as Ashley made her way to the alter.

"Amy what are you doing?" Ashley said nervously.

"I can't do this without you here next to me." she gave a watery smile.

A tear ran down Ashley's cheek as she embraced her sister in a hug. A hug that hadn't felt this genuine in forever.

"I can never thank you enough for being there for me, and believing in me when it came to John. If anything from the past matters that does and I would be honored if you would stand over there and be my maid of honor." Amy announced to her shocked sister.

"Okay." she squeaked out making her way just behind her sister. A smile plastered across her lips.

"Alright I'm ready to kiss the bride." Ricky said smiling.

Amy rolled her eyes and grasped Ricky's hands once more.

"Without further ado or interruptions I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

Ricky was already kissing Amy before he finished the sentence and the crowd all began to cheer.

* * *

><p>"I couldn't have chosen a better day to celebrate my 19th birthday." Ricky sighed pulling Amy closer to him.<p>

They were wrapped in each other's arms after a their crazy day. It had been stressful, but worth every moment because in the end it was just the two of them. The two of them against the world.

"Best honeymoon ever." Amy breathed against his chest. "Happy Birthday Mr. Underwood."

"Thank you Mrs. Underwood." he replied placing a chaste kiss on her forehead. "Can I have my present again?" he smirked.

"I thought you'd never ask." she laughed. "Round 3."

**Epilogue coming up...I was going to do the reception, but the chapter was going long. And I didn't really think it'd add anything to the story. Anywho thanks so much for reading and I love you all and wish you kisses lol. And sorry again for taking so long work was kicking my butt. I will proofread later promise.**


	17. Epilogue: Hey There Delilah

***Although we come to the end of the road lol. You guys I just want to thank you for sticking with me throughout this story and my others. Words can't express how much your reviews mean to me. I will miss this story so much and I hope you guys continue to enjoy my other endeavors. I plan on writing Bamon stories next on the TVD category so we'll see how that turns out; also look out for my Ramy/Benadrian drabbles I'm also starting. As usual I OWN NOTHING ITS BRENDA'S AND ABC FAMILYS! Except the plot. Sorry for the long A/N.***

**Epilogue: Hey There Delilah**

**3 years later…**

She crawled onto the bed quiet as a church mouse, careful not to wake the sleeping man that occupied the king sized bed. Ricky stirred slightly at the movement of the bed; and opened his eyes as the body snuggled against his chest.

A tired yawn escaped his mouth as he laid eyes on the disturbance in his bed. A grin dawning his lips at the lovely sight. Her green eyes snapped shut attempting to pretend she'd been in the bed all along. Ricky let out a low chuckle. All this time and she still wants too play.

"Okay we'll pretend you've been here all night." Ricky whispered against her long wavy hair.

A smile twitched on her lips exposing that lone dimple he loved so much. He cradled her against his chest and hummed the little tune she favored.

"Ricky" a voice said softly from the door.

"Uh oh" Ricky smiled. "Busted."

Amy stood at the doorway of their bedroom hands on her hips. She tapped her foot on the hardwood floors.

"We talked about this." she whispered trying not wake up their company.

Ricky sat up with his prize still clung to his chest his mouth turned down into a frown.

"But Ames she doesn't like it in there." he pouted.

Amy walked further into room and back next to her whining husband.

"Ricky she isn't even sleep." she retorted with a smirk.

"Looks like mommy doesn't like sharing." he whispered in his daughters' ear.

Amy rolled her eyes, "don't say bad things about me to her." she huffed.

He laughed and sank back into the covers sliding her in snuggly between him and Amy.

"If you keep letting her sleep in her she's never gonna learn to use her own bed." Amy reasoned.

Ricky gave an exasperated sigh and glanced back to his bundle. "How can you say no to this face." he argued rubbing his nose against the girls'.

"The same way you did when John wanted to sleep with me." she glared knowingly.

He laughed. "She's our little miracle." he said moving the hair from the little girls eyes.

Amy smiled as she twirled a lock around her finger. "I know." she said softly.

"And to answer your question I have a problem saying no to pretty girls with green eyes." he winked.

Amy tapped his arm before placing a kiss on his lips. Ricky smiled looking at the two girls who held his heart. All that was missing was his spitting image.

"Mommy." a little voice squeaked out.

"Yes John?" Amy answered turning her gaze to her 6 year old son.

"Can I come in too." his big brown eyes pleading for entry.

She glanced at Ricky who know held a chasseur cat grin of victory.

"Of course buddy." she smiled scooting over to make more room.

"Good thing we went for the king sized" Ricky joked.

They laughed until a little hand reached up placing a finger in his dimple.

"Oh looks whose finally opened those eyes." Amy commented at her sneaky daughter.

Ricky laughed as he tickled his baby girl's neck.

"Hey there Delilah." he smiled.

**That's all folks =). Of course I know you guys recognize the song name which is one of my favs and I thought what better name than this to use for Amy and Ricky's daughter lol. As always love all who took the time to read my crazy/randomness. In the words of Henry/Hank Peace, Love, and Soul lol.**


End file.
